Proposed Warning Labels for Alcohol Containers
1. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what happened to your bra.
2. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
3. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard.
4. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friend over and over again that you love them.
5. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.