It is common knowledge that I smoke.
Tonight, after the great leaky bath/blown lighting debacle, I needed a well earned drink and escorted Mrs TMRBB to the only watering hole in the area - a Harvester. The locals that have the power of speech greeted me as they have done over the last few days. A few Guinnesses and a couple of white wine were consumed. We decided that rather than cook something, we would avail ourselves of the cheap and cheerful fare on offer.
Then the mischieviousness took over.
They have tables outside - albeit covered in 6 inches of snow. I informed the barman of our chosen food and asked that it be delivered to table 8 - he said "but that's outside".
"I know", I replied, "But I like a cigarette or two before and after a meal".
Much stammering ensued. Two of the natives guffawed like asthmatic donkeys. Mrs TMRBB and I put our coats and scarves on and went outside, sitting at table 8. Fags were lit. Five minutes later the manager came out and stated he couldn't deliver the food outside in case one of his staff slipped and injured themselves. "But you could have injured yourself just coming to tell me that", i offered. "I know", he said, "So if you agree to eat inside, we would be pleased to give you a complimentary bottle of wine".
"Fair enough" said Mrs TMRBB.
Result. Perfectly edible steaks and stuff, plus a free bottle of plonk.
