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Author Topic: The all new TG's gorra job, worra bout you thread  (Read 101553 times)

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Offline Mrs TG

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Re: TG's gizza job thread.
« Reply #105 on: September 22, 2008, 11:01:43 AM »
Quote from: Nick on September 22, 2008, 11:00:07 AM
Has worked for a pittance in Leicester for 30 years and thus has very low expectations

mmmm you have it so right! this job is for government so gota be better!  eyes:
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: TG's gizza job thread.
« Reply #106 on: September 22, 2008, 11:02:43 AM »
Quote from: Mrs TG on September 22, 2008, 10:58:31 AM
Quote from: Snoopy on September 22, 2008, 10:55:20 AM
Quote from: Nick on September 22, 2008, 10:52:25 AM
"independently undertakes research amongst his extensive network"

happy088

"Bossed around a lot by Mrs TG" - just does as he is told!

"Doesn't drive" Not for the want of  kicking up arse from Mrs TG
"Drinks" Only usually at weekends!

We were trying to help him get a job

Bossed round a lot by Mrs TG should read "Will see any designated task through to completion"
Doesn't Drive should read "Fully committed to encouraging a greener environment"
Drinks should read "Has a full and active social life"
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: TG's gizza job thread.
« Reply #107 on: September 22, 2008, 11:04:07 AM »
Quote from: Nick on September 22, 2008, 11:00:07 AM
Has worked for a pittance in Leicester for 30 years and thus has very low expectations

Always prepared to accept the rough with the smooth for the benefit of his employer.
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Offline Nick

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Re: TG's gizza job thread.
« Reply #108 on: September 22, 2008, 11:09:30 AM »
This is going well!
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: TG's gizza job thread.
« Reply #109 on: September 22, 2008, 11:10:23 AM »
Too well methinks  whistle:
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Offline TG

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Re: TG's gizza job thread.
« Reply #110 on: September 22, 2008, 11:10:42 AM »
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Offline TG

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Re: TG's gizza job thread.
« Reply #111 on: September 22, 2008, 11:12:36 AM »
Lets summarize then.

TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN

I am a drunken, henpecked nondriver who will work for feck all...

Have I missed anything?
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: TG's gizza job thread.
« Reply #112 on: September 22, 2008, 11:13:01 AM »
Quote from: TG on September 22, 2008, 11:10:42 AM
Quote from: Nick on September 22, 2008, 11:09:30 AM
This is going well!

It is?  eeek:

Of course ~ we've done the hard bit, now just dress it up with a few flowery phrases and HR buzz words and Robert will become a very close male relation.
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Online Barman

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Re: TG's gizza job thread.
« Reply #113 on: September 22, 2008, 11:17:42 AM »
Quote from: TG on September 22, 2008, 10:19:44 AM
DEFRA just sent me yet another form to fill in.

I have done this and sent it back with the following covering letter :

Dear Cow killers.

I want this job because I enjoy killing.

I also believe that cows are evil and should be purged from the face of the earth.

Also, my friend Mr Icke says that cows are in fact extra-terrestial alligators in disguise. He's a bit of a twat to be honest but sometimes when you look into the cold, calculating eyes of a cow (especially those hairy northern feckers) you have to wonder don't you?

Anywho, gizza job.

Yours Faithfully
Mr T. Gunner.
That gold plated pension is as good as yours!  happy088
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Offline Mrs TG

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Re: TG's gizza job thread.
« Reply #114 on: September 22, 2008, 11:18:10 AM »
Quote from: Snoopy on September 22, 2008, 11:02:43 AM
Quote from: Mrs TG on September 22, 2008, 10:58:31 AM
Quote from: Snoopy on September 22, 2008, 10:55:20 AM
Quote from: Nick on September 22, 2008, 10:52:25 AM
"independently undertakes research amongst his extensive network"

happy088

"Bossed around a lot by Mrs TG" - just does as he is told!

"Doesn't drive" Not for the want of  kicking up arse from Mrs TG
"Drinks" Only usually at weekends!

We were trying to help him get a job

Bossed round a lot by Mrs TG should read "Will see any designated task through to completion"
Doesn't Drive should read "Fully committed to encouraging a greener environment"
Drinks should read "Has a full and active social life"

love it, this gets better.... point:
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Offline Darwins Selection

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Re: TG's gizza job thread.
« Reply #115 on: September 22, 2008, 11:50:06 AM »
Quote from: Mrs TG on September 22, 2008, 11:18:10 AM
Quote from: Snoopy on September 22, 2008, 11:02:43 AM
Quote from: Mrs TG on September 22, 2008, 10:58:31 AM
Quote from: Snoopy on September 22, 2008, 10:55:20 AM
Quote from: Nick on September 22, 2008, 10:52:25 AM
"independently undertakes research amongst his extensive network"

happy088

"Bossed around a lot by Mrs TG" - just does as he is told!

"Doesn't drive" Not for the want of  kicking up arse from Mrs TG
"Drinks" Only usually at weekends!

We were trying to help him get a job

Bossed round a lot by Mrs TG should read "Will see any designated task through to completion"
Doesn't Drive should read "Fully committed to encouraging a greener environment"
Drinks should read "Has a full and active social life"

love it, this gets better.... point:

Make sure you use the name Tariq Gupta to ensure you get an interview, or sue them for discrimination if you don't.
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Online Barman

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Re: TG's gizza job thread.
« Reply #116 on: September 22, 2008, 11:54:57 AM »
"Reads and likes the theatre and cinema..." (porn)
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Offline Nick

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Re: TG's gizza job thread.
« Reply #117 on: September 22, 2008, 12:54:23 PM »
Oh yes, tick an odd box on the Equal Opps form. The "White British" one will get you nowhere (and I am serious!)
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: TG's gizza job thread.
« Reply #118 on: September 22, 2008, 01:30:48 PM »
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Offline The Moan Ranger

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Re: TG's gizza job thread.
« Reply #119 on: September 23, 2008, 10:52:55 AM »
Tel - Catholic charity. It wouldn't be a certain Celtic F.C.  would it? 
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