The all new what are you giving for Christmas thread

[Darwins Selection]

Further to my comment re homework. The Teenage Hormone Wreck has had her own Lap-top and printer for a couple of years.
Last week she was both "heartbroken" and incensed to have ALL of her English and History course work returned to her by the two respective teachers as unacceptable because she had done it on her lap-top and it was not handwritten.

Much weeping and gnashing of teeth, shouts of "UNFAIR" rang through the land and I said ... "I told you so but you wouldn't listen ~ as always you knew best ~ now shut up and start writing"

I.T. is the only subject that demands computer useage. For other subjects it is handy but most teachers and ALL examination boards say that too much reliance on computers endangers genuine original work by the student and suggests that they are taking "the easy route and copying work".
Despite T Bliar's promise that every child will have a computer a great many do not. Access to school computers at the THW's school has to be booked 14 days in advance and preference is given to those doing IT at GCSE level. It is therefore impossible for teachers to expect homework/coursework to be done on a computer and they want everyone to be playing at the same level in order that the teachers may grade work properly ~ so paper and pen it is and will remain so for a long time yet.

At least if she copies out the word-processed homework in her own fair hand, the spelling and grammar should be 100% correct. (Unless her PC is set to "Colonial" of course)

[Snoopy]

Further to my comment re homework. The Teenage Hormone Wreck has had her own Lap-top and printer for a couple of years.
Last week she was both "heartbroken" and incensed to have ALL of her English and History course work returned to her by the two respective teachers as unacceptable because she had done it on her lap-top and it was not handwritten.

Much weeping and gnashing of teeth, shouts of "UNFAIR" rang through the land and I said ... "I told you so but you wouldn't listen ~ as always you knew best ~ now shut up and start writing"

I.T. is the only subject that demands computer useage. For other subjects it is handy but most teachers and ALL examination boards say that too much reliance on computers endangers genuine original work by the student and suggests that they are taking "the easy route and copying work".
Despite T Bliar's promise that every child will have a computer a great many do not. Access to school computers at the THW's school has to be booked 14 days in advance and preference is given to those doing IT at GCSE level. It is therefore impossible for teachers to expect homework/coursework to be done on a computer and they want everyone to be playing at the same level in order that the teachers may grade work properly ~ so paper and pen it is and will remain so for a long time yet.

At least if she copies out the word-processed homework in her own fair hand, the spelling and grammar should be 100% correct. (Unless her PC is set to "Colonial" of course)

You would have thought so wouldn't you ~ but then, like me, you are a reasonable person. The THW however does not believe her spell checker and simply overrides it. She is, after all, a 15 year old GCSE student and, as we all know, they know best about everything 

[Darwins Selection]

Further to my comment re homework. The Teenage Hormone Wreck has had her own Lap-top and printer for a couple of years.
Last week she was both "heartbroken" and incensed to have ALL of her English and History course work returned to her by the two respective teachers as unacceptable because she had done it on her lap-top and it was not handwritten.

Much weeping and gnashing of teeth, shouts of "UNFAIR" rang through the land and I said ... "I told you so but you wouldn't listen ~ as always you knew best ~ now shut up and start writing"

I.T. is the only subject that demands computer useage. For other subjects it is handy but most teachers and ALL examination boards say that too much reliance on computers endangers genuine original work by the student and suggests that they are taking "the easy route and copying work".
Despite T Bliar's promise that every child will have a computer a great many do not. Access to school computers at the THW's school has to be booked 14 days in advance and preference is given to those doing IT at GCSE level. It is therefore impossible for teachers to expect homework/coursework to be done on a computer and they want everyone to be playing at the same level in order that the teachers may grade work properly ~ so paper and pen it is and will remain so for a long time yet.

At least if she copies out the word-processed homework in her own fair hand, the spelling and grammar should be 100% correct. (Unless her PC is set to "Colonial" of course)

You would have thought so wouldn't you ~ but then, like me, you are a reasonable person. The THW however does not believe her spell checker and simply overrides it. She is, after all, a 15 year old GCSE student and, as we all know, they know best about everything 

Silly me, of course.

[Bar Wench]

Anyway back to Christmas!

[Nick]

Is that food, decorations or a spillage?

[Pastis]

That's not spillage... That's delicious and exquisitely crafted, sumptuously tasting M&S Spillage, only £16.95 for a guaranteed romantic night at home. The chocolate will be all over the sofa, the metal decoration on your loved one's head and God knows where the nuts will end up.
M&S, your kind of Christmas 

[Nick]

Crown or pastrycutter?

[Pastis]

Crown definitely. Look at the shape, 6 pointed, Star of David... must be M&S 

[Nick]

Is that a festive starfish then?

[Darwins Selection]

Is that a festive starfish then?

Silly boy. 

Starfish=five pointed=Gentile.

[Pastis]

Is that a festive starfish then?

Silly boy. 

Starfish=five pointed=Gentile.

Thank you DS. At last a man who knows his Stars from his Hell Boys.

[Nick]

No, that brown thing on the huge cinnamon log 

[Pastis]

Oh that! 

Giant slice of Kiwi fruit, battered and dusted in cinnamon? Overgrown Okra? Who knows? It's a surprise after all 

[Nick]

No, it's a starfish. Festive south of the equator

[Just One More]

No, that brown thing on the huge cinnamon log 

Star anise