We get Mormons, Evangelists, Scientologists and Jehovah's Witnesses round my way. Evidently I have some invisible sign that indicates my soul needs saving because the buggers keep heading for me like a Godahawk Cruise Missile.
My responses tend to be along the lines of:
Mormons - No caffiene? No Alcohol? Bugger off!
Evangelists - But how do you know God didnt create homosexuality as a form of population control?
Scientologists - You want me to sign up for a religion where the big secret is that an intergalactic warlord dumped slaves in volcanoes here and then nuked them, creating life on earth?
Strangely enough I'm polite to the Jehovah's Witnesses. mainly baecause they know by now I'm a lost cause so arent rabidly trying to verbally batter me into submission when I say I'm not interested.