The All New Decorating Thread

[Barman]

This saga has gone on for so long that I can't possibly be expected to remember all the details.

<stalks off nose in air>

No doubt the smell of paint is getting to you...

[Barman]

The heat may cause the paint to seperate if it has been left standing for long enough but as BM has apparently been shaking and stirring it that shouldn't be a problem.

Have you tried putting the pump higher then the roller?

Yes of course I have you buffoon! 

The pump can't get it out of the pot let alone up the pipe... Putting it on a high shelf (like the last Dulux girl suggested) makes no difference at all... 

Fuck me... 19 pages of decorating thread and I haven't started... um, decorating yet... 

[Grumpmeister]

There's no need to bite my head off just because you were dazzled by the flashing lights and bought a duff gadget BM. I made the suggestion to test if my theory about the paint pump not being powerful enough was accurate.

 

[Barman]

There's no need to bite my head off just because you were dazzled by the flashing lights and bought a duff gadget BM. I made the suggestion to test if my theory about the paint pump not being powerful enough was accurate.

 

It wasn't... 

[Bar Wench]

There's no need to bite my head off just because you were dazzled by the flashing lights and bought a duff gadget BM. I made the suggestion to test if my theory about the paint pump not being powerful enough was accurate.

 

He is going on the attack which is something all blokes do when they know they are in the wrong. 

[Barman]

There's no need to bite my head off just because you were dazzled by the flashing lights and bought a duff gadget BM. I made the suggestion to test if my theory about the paint pump not being powerful enough was accurate.

 

He is going on the attack which is something all blokes do when they know they are in the wrong. 

I'm not wrong!!! 

[Bar Wench]

You are. Because if you had stuck to a roller and tray like LL told you to in the beginning you would have been finished by now. Instead you've purchased a sub-par tool and spent a fortune on petrol and wasted your time on tinkering with it. And you know it. Which is why you are cross. 

[Barman]

You are. Because if you had stuck to a roller and tray like LL told you to in the beginning you would have been finished by now. Instead you've purchased a sub-par tool and spent a fortune on petrol and wasted your time on tinkering with it. And you know it. Which is why you are cross. 

If I'd stuck to a roller and try I'd be fucked by now and covered in paint and only about 5% of the house would be done... 

Mind you, I am fucked now aren't I...? 

[Bar Wench]

Or not as the case may be! 

[Barman]

Or not as the case may be! 

Not... most definitely... no... 

[TG]

My dad was a professional painter & decorator. Old School. High standards.

I worked for him as an apprentice for 3 months until he sacked me for being a useless twat.

I still feel ashamed whenever I use a 2 quid B&Q roller (and 5 brushes for a quid) to do a room.

Still, I wouldn't stoop as low as an IcantPaintPod thingy.

He would say : 'Don't be a twat, it will never work' He's been dead a few years but he is evidently still right. 

[Snoopy]

BM's paint pod won't suck up or spray
Nor paint in any old way
He's gubbed up the job
When for only five bob
He could have done it with a roller and tray

[Bar Wench]

BM's paint pod won't suck up or spray
Nor paint in any old way
He's gubbed up the job
When for only five bob
He could have done it with a roller and tray

And got his end away.

[Pastis]

BM's paint pod won't suck up or spray
Nor paint in any old way
He's gubbed up the job
When for only five bob
He could have done it with a roller and tray

 

If I may ...

A Barman who lived in the Med
Never listened to what others said.
Painting's quite simple...
Even after a skinful,
But not with a PaintPod that's dead!

[Barman]