The all new gaffes and foot in mouth thread

[Nick]

Just to start you off.

At a party, saw 2 women who looked a bit similar. "Ah, " I said in a jolly way, " you must be mother and daughter."

"No, we are sisters."

I left

[Darwins Selection]

Just to start you off.

At a party, saw 2 women who looked a bit similar. "Ah, " I said in a jolly way, " you must be mother and daughter."

"No, we are sisters."

I left

One of them probably thought you were charming. 

[Nick]

Mistakenly impersonating a hovercraft in a job interview 

[Darwins Selection]

1. Offering the Round Table the muck-spreader to tart up as 'Santa's Sleigh'.
2. Trying to justify said offer on the grounds of "Authentic Reindeer aroma"
3. Telling Mrs DS #3 about 1 and 2. 

[Nick]

Saying a lot of very rude things about Virginia Bottomley to a woman I met at a reception.

When I had finished she boomed, "Young man. I am Virginia Bottomley's mother." 

[Nick]

3. Telling Mrs DS #3 about 1 and 2

Fetches popcorn

[Bar Wench]

Father Wench telling Brother Wench, whilst pissed, that he was a mistake.

[Nick]

 

Mind you, so was I 

[Bar Wench]

I was wanted. 

[Nick]

But no longer...?

[Bar Wench]

I was at the time and that is all that matters! 

[Darwins Selection]

I was wanted. 

Did he tell you that when pissed as well?

[Snoopy]

Mind you, so was I 

Strangely, I think we had worked that out for ourselves like 

[Grumpmeister]

I'm impressed, I had assumed this would be a purely Nick thread. 

[Nick]

We await reports of your top gaffe