The extortionate price of rugs!

[Miss Demeanour]

Why didn't I see it coming?

That my dear should be your epitaph 

[Nick]

 

Furthermore, we cannot redecorate until the craters have been repaired, which involves plasterers 

[Pastis]

Why didn't I see it coming?

That my dear should be your epitaph 

 

Didn't you mention something a few pages back about the need to move house to accommodate the rug? 

[Miss Demeanour]

It's just a matter of time Pastis 

[Pastis]

... craters ...

 

[Barman]

Why didn't I see it coming?

Cos you are bonkers? 

[Nick]

... craters ...

 

I may try to get a pic later. The Boy's favoured chair (think Captain Kirk) is festooned with remote controls, Horrid Henry books and simliar shite. It stands with its back to one wall. He cannot enter the room and sit on the chair. Oh no. He runs at full tilt and performs an aerial forward summersault landing on the chair in a sitting position.

Repeated impacts over the years have in fact forced the chair into the wall causing lunar style craters in the plaster 

These have to be repaired (prolly entire wall needs doing cos of other hairline fractures caused by said feat.) 

[Pastis]

Ah ha. I see it now. Well, you've only a few more years of this. My two nephews have caused untold damage to hearth and home... contact sports in the bathroom, skateboarding through the kitchen, field hockey, cricket etc in any available space with expensive consequences. 

[Nick]

We have stopped repairing much of the damage  It seems pointless, but this time we are going to put a crash barrier between chair and wall (or a big spike on a spring inside the chair  )

[Miss Demeanour]

Can't you remove the chair from the front room ?

That way at least if it's in his bedroom  for example, he is just doing damage to his own room and not the room where you and your guests (minus the elephant) are likely to sit in most.

[Barman]

Do you want me to have a look at it...?  I've got a big tub of Polyfiller and some other tubes of, um... filler too... 

[GROWLER]

Why didn't I see it coming?

Cos you are bonkers? 

You are too kind with your choice of words.

No. You ARE a great raving stupid friggin titmouse, and will receive minus amounts of sympathy and understanding.
You deserve all the grief and heartache that is now coming your way, bloody great dozy cock that you are.

[Snoopy]

... craters ...

 

I may try to get a pic later. The Boy's favoured chair (think Captain Kirk) is festooned with remote controls, Horrid Henry books and simliar shite. It stands with its back to one wall. He cannot enter the room and sit on the chair. Oh no. He runs at full tilt and performs an aerial forward summersault landing on the chair in a sitting position.

Repeated impacts over the years have in fact forced the chair into the wall causing lunar style craters in the plaster 

These have to be repaired (prolly entire wall needs doing cos of other hairline fractures caused by said feat.) 

I have seen this wall ~ it is as Nick says. 

[GROWLER]

This whole ridiculous rug thing episode make me feel like rippin' me smouldering red hot bladder out with me bare hands, and hurling it at him.

[Nick]

All that cake has gone now