I'm begining to dislike this pirate character ~ not only does he get the best lines but his avartar is too damned good looking evil:
Don't feel threatened Snoops - you're still top dog cloud9:
Just wait till he tries to walk to the door ~ I'm chewing my way through his wooden leg.
Too late Snoopy, My black labradoodle has chewed through the leg and damned near everything else.
I'll tell you a yarn about my wooden leg:
I walked into a bar (not this one) and the bartender says, "Hey, I haven't seen you in a while. What happened, you look terrible!"
"What do you mean?" I said, "I'm fine. "
The bartender says, "But what about that wooden leg? You didn't have that before. "
"Well," says I "We were in a battle at sea and a cannon ball hit my leg but the surgeon fixed me up, and I'm fine, really. "
"Yeah," says the bartender, "But what about that hook? Last time I saw you, you had both hands. "
"Well," says I "We were in another battle and we boarded the enemy ship. I was in a sword fight and my hand was cut off but the surgeon fixed me up with this hook, and I feel great, really. "
"Oh," says the bartender, "What about that eye patch? Last time you were in here you had both eyes. "
"Aye," said I "One day when we were at sea, some birds were flying over the ship. I looked up, and one of them shat in my eye. "
"So?" replied the bartender, "what happened? You couldn't have lost an eye just from some bird shit!"
"Well," I said, "I really wasn't used to the hook yet. "
