TMR's all new Bulletins from Scotland thread

[Snoopy]

Serious head < There are as many variants on the Scottish accent as there are on the English accent> end of serious mode

I know. But they are all Scottish 

TBH I have never had any problem understanding them ~ perhaps because my maternal Grandfather's family hailed from Inverness or perhaps because I met so many in the RAF. Like the Welsh they do have some ranting nationalists among them but the majority are pleasant enough people and they do make grand Chief Engineers ~ see any wartime movie involving ships and Star Trek of course.
What I dislike about Scotland is that it has always been so f*cking cold and wet whenever I have been there.

[The Moan Ranger]

We got longhorns in Surrey, just down the road from here, though not for much longer.

http://www.getsurrey.co.uk/news/s/99083_trust_plans_to_fence_off_most_of_heath_and_replace_cattle

Grand wee beasties for keeping the gorse and heather under control. B@st@rd things will eat almost anything actually and can be left out in all weathers. Useful animal taken all in all. Taste good too.

The same can be said of women 

[Miss Demeanour]

 

[Nick]

My knowledge of Scottish geography is sketchy. I know I am flying to Glasgow on June 8th, so I booked the hotel I stayed in last time 

I now find I have to go to GREENOCK!! Looked at a map. 

40 minute train ride at least, which means being on the train at about fooking 7.30 in the morning and then Greenock to fooking Edinburgh on the train later. Have you seen how far Edinburgh is from Greenock?  Opposite fooking coast FFS 

[Miss Demeanour]

I am sure with your organisational skills it will all be fine 

[Nick]

What could possibly go wrong?

[Barman]

My knowledge of Scottish geography is sketchy. I know I am flying to Glasgow on June 8th, so I booked the hotel I stayed in last time 

I now find I have to go to GREENOCK!! Looked at a map. 

40 minute train ride at least, which means being on the train at about fooking 7.30 in the morning and then Greenock to fooking Edinburgh on the train later. Have you seen how far Edinburgh is from Greenock?  Opposite fooking coast FFS 

Why don't you just rent a car FFS?

Oh, of course... 

[Snoopy]

Indeed Coast to Coast but then Scotland is not very wide at that point.

Greenock to Edinburgh is about 70 miles
Glasgow to Edinburgh is about 45 miles

Why not book into a hotel in Greenock and cancel the Glasgow booking then you would not have to start out from the wrong place? 

SWWLTBO grew up in Dunblane (See Stirling on the map) and knows Scotland well ~ you could always ask.

[Nick]

Booking in Glasgow is non-refundable 

[Snoopy]

Well what a tit you are then! 

[Nick]

 

[Miss Demeanour]

Well what a tit you are then! 

Snoopy's sympathy teachings - a  masterclass 

[Barman]

Booking in Glasgow is non-refundable 

You bought the cheapest non-refundable ticket yet are charging the client the most expensive business class air fare...? 

[Nick]

No you idiot, the cheapo hotel booking is non refundable!! 

[Nick]

My knowledge of Scottish geography is sketchy. I know I am flying to Glasgow on June 8th, so I booked the hotel I stayed in last time 

I now find I have to go to GREENOCK!! Looked at a map. 

40 minute train ride at least, which means being on the train at about fooking 7.30 in the morning and then Greenock to fooking Edinburgh on the train later. Have you seen how far Edinburgh is from Greenock?  Opposite fooking coast FFS 

Why don't you just rent a car FFS?

Oh, of course... 

Bastardo