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Author Topic: MILF on a plate  (Read 2387 times)

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Offline Nick

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MILF on a plate
« on: May 08, 2009, 12:43:36 PM »
Blimey!  eeek:

In the Village there are some nice MILFs. ONe I have always fancied. The lovely S. We have mutual friends. She has, on the rare occasions that we have met socially (twice a year?), been amiable, even flirty.

She has a boring husband (engineer)  noooo:

She parked her car earlier outside my house. Tesco were delivering so I waved at her, cheerily. She had gone off to the pub for a girly lunch

She just knocked at the door. Flat tyre  rubschin:

I gave her a coffee (she had called the AA)

We got chatting. I gave her a HobNob

She, um, asked where Mrs Nick was. Work. What time is she back? 6

'We have lots of time then'  scared2:  eyes: (she has had some collapso)

Me, weakly, 'Well the AA will be here soon'

Her: 'After that'  eyes:

 scared2:

Tempting, I admit. Fortunately the AA got here sharpish. I have locked the door  confused:

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Offline Snoopy

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Re: MILF on a plate
« Reply #1 on: May 08, 2009, 12:49:42 PM »
 Banghead
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Uncle Mort

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Re: MILF on a plate
« Reply #2 on: May 08, 2009, 12:49:57 PM »
Who let the air out of tyre. You or her?

Offline Nick

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Re: MILF on a plate
« Reply #3 on: May 08, 2009, 12:50:31 PM »
Not me, guv  noooo:
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Offline Nick

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Re: MILF on a plate
« Reply #4 on: May 08, 2009, 12:51:32 PM »
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Offline Pastis

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Re: MILF on a plate
« Reply #5 on: May 08, 2009, 12:54:36 PM »
"I gave her a HobNob"

What number euphemism is that again?  To save me looking it up, like.
Like the Buddhist said to the hot dog vendor...
"Make me one with everything"

Offline Nick

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Re: MILF on a plate
« Reply #6 on: May 08, 2009, 12:55:27 PM »
 evil:
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Offline Pastis

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Re: MILF on a plate
« Reply #7 on: May 08, 2009, 01:01:28 PM »
If it was only a flat tyre, could you not go out there and fix the spare for her? An act of gallantry I would have thought that would

i) See her on her way
ii) Absolve you from temptation and
iii) Raise your stock for later eventualities
Like the Buddhist said to the hot dog vendor...
"Make me one with everything"

Offline Nick

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Re: MILF on a plate
« Reply #8 on: May 08, 2009, 01:04:42 PM »
The AA were on their way  Banghead Banghead
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Offline Pastis

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Re: MILF on a plate
« Reply #9 on: May 08, 2009, 01:12:43 PM »
Oh  redface:

Well, just take my post as a plan for the future  ;)
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Offline Darwins Selection

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Re: MILF on a plate
« Reply #10 on: May 08, 2009, 01:17:01 PM »
. .  just take my 'post' as a plan for the future

That's just what he said to her.  eyes:
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Offline Barman

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Re: MILF on a plate
« Reply #11 on: May 08, 2009, 01:25:25 PM »
. .  just take my 'post' as a plan for the future

That's just what he said to her.  eyes:
drumroll:
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: MILF on a plate
« Reply #12 on: May 08, 2009, 02:14:54 PM »
How many times do I have to say: "It is often a mistake to sleep with a woman but it is ALWAYS a mistake not to"?
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Nick

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Re: MILF on a plate
« Reply #13 on: May 08, 2009, 02:20:37 PM »
Sleeping was not on her mind  eeek:

So you DO want her number
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: MILF on a plate
« Reply #14 on: May 08, 2009, 02:32:46 PM »
Sleep in this context is a euphemism for "have sex with" and no, Thank you, she would not want a call from me ~ it was you that passed up on the opportunity. I can find my own.
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.