Hat, coat...

[Barman]

A man on his deathbed requested his wife, 3 sons, his nurse and a camera to be set up to record his final moments. Which were as follows...
"To my son, David, I leave the 2 blocks of flats in the East End of London.
To my other son, Michael, I leave the 4 penthouses in Chelsea,
and finally to my eldest son, Kevin, I leave the big glass building near Tower Bridge."

With that he slipped away. The nurse turned to the wife and said, "I never realised your husband was so wealthy. You and your sons are very lucky."

His wife swiftly replied, "Was he bollocks! He was a fucking window cleaner!"

[Darwins Selection]

A man on his deathbed requested his wife, 3 sons, his nurse and a camera to be set up to record his final moments. Which were as follows...
"To my son, David, I leave the 2 blocks of flats in the East End of London.
To my other son, Michael, I leave the 4 penthouses in Chelsea,
and finally to my eldest son, Kevin, I leave the big glass building near Tower Bridge."

With that he slipped away. The nurse turned to the wife and said, "I never realised your husband was so wealthy. You and your sons are very lucky."

His wife swiftly replied, "Was he bollocks! He was a fucking window cleaner!"

 

[apc2010]

I'm going to have to rethink my time machine rental business.............

[Nick]

 

[Barman]

I'm going to have to rethink my time machine rental business.............

[Darwins Selection]

I'm going to have to rethink my time machine rental business.............

 

[Steve]

I'm going to have to rethink my time machine rental business.............

 

[apc2010]

There's a sign in the gents at my local pub saying, 'Please leave these toilets as you found them.'...........





Do I walk out backwards.................

[apc2010]

Why do the homeless drink Tenants.........

[Barman]

Why do the homeless drink Tenants.........

 

[Nick]

Nun 1: There a case of syphilis in the convent!
Nun 2: Praise the Lord, I am sick of the Beaujolais






















bye

[Barman]

Nun 1: There a case of syphilis in the convent!
Nun 2: Praise the Lord, I am sick of the Beaujolais






















bye

 

[Steve]

Nun 1: There a case of syphilis in the convent!
Nun 2: Praise the Lord, I am sick of the Beaujolais






















bye

 

 

[apc2010]

Nun 1: There a case of syphilis in the convent!
Nun 2: Praise the Lord, I am sick of the Beaujolais






















bye

 

[apc2010]

Pythagoras walks into a bar muttering, 'If a right-angled triangle has a short side, X, a long side, Y, and hypotenuse, Z, then the square of Z must be equal to the sum of the square of X and the square of, erm... uh...'






The barman says, 'Y, the long face'....................