There's a new reality show featuring Elton John, George Michael, Michael Barrymore, Graham Norton and Alan Carr
"The Only Way Is Arse Sex".
Me and the wife bought a water bed, but had to get rid of it, as it was ruining our relationship... We were just slowly drifting apart.
12 family meals for less than £10....that's why mums go to iceland.
A 16 year old bouncing up and down on you for less than £10....that's why dads go to Thailand.
I was working in Tesco last night when I bumped into the lady I just started dating. I was re-arranging the washing powder in aisle 7 when she said "oi you told me you was a stunt pilot you lying bastard!" To which I replied
"No, I told you I was part of the Ariel display team ..."
For Miss C...
I watched my cock go in and out , in and out ,and in and out ..
It was getting wetter and wetter ..
All I could think was ...
Get in your fucking coop it's starting to rain
Some bloke just hit me over the head with a power tool... I was minding my own business then ..........bosch!
