Hat, coat...

[Just One More]

"Look, I've found a bottle of Cherry Coke with your name on it," I said to my son Litre.

[apc2010]

"Look, I've found a bottle of Cherry Coke with your name on it," I said to my son Litre.

 

[Just One More]

My next door neighbour knocked on my door wearing just a see through negligee, asked to borrow a cup of sugar and then asked to come in for a cup of coffee.

I said "Fuck off Dave, I've got to go to work."

[Just One More]

I caught my wife hard at it with the window cleaner today.

I said to her, "What's the fucking point in paying him if you're gonna help clean the windows."

[Just One More]

As she slowly eased the cucumber into my arse, it got me thinking...

I won't ask for help with packing the shopping again.

[Baldy]

My next door neighbour knocked on my door wearing just a see through negligee, asked to borrow a cup of sugar and then asked to come in for a cup of coffee.

I said "Fuck off Dave, I've got to go to work."

 

[Baldy]

As she slowly eased the cucumber into my arse, it got me thinking...

I won't ask for help with packing the shopping again.

 

[Just One More]

I just bumped into Bruce Forsyth without a wig on. To be fair he probably doesn't know I usually wear one.

[Baldy]

I just bumped into Bruce Forsyth without a wig on. To be fair he probably doesn't know I usually wear one.

 

[Steve]

My new years resolution was to lose 20 pounds by the end of summer.

I've only got 30 pounds to go.

I've just made the best recipe for tofu ever!

Simply brush generously with extra virgin olive oil before lightly tossing it in the bin. 

"Look, I've found a bottle of Cherry Coke with your name on it," I said to my son Litre.

I caught my wife hard at it with the window cleaner today.

I said to her, "What's the fucking point in paying him if you're gonna help clean the windows."

As she slowly eased the cucumber into my arse, it got me thinking...

I won't ask for help with packing the shopping again.

[Barman]

My new years resolution was to lose 20 pounds by the end of summer.

I've only got 30 pounds to go.

I've just made the best recipe for tofu ever!

Simply brush generously with extra virgin olive oil before lightly tossing it in the bin. 

"Look, I've found a bottle of Cherry Coke with your name on it," I said to my son Litre.

I caught my wife hard at it with the window cleaner today.

I said to her, "What's the fucking point in paying him if you're gonna help clean the windows."

As she slowly eased the cucumber into my arse, it got me thinking...

I won't ask for help with packing the shopping again.

^^^ wot he said  ^^^

[boogs]

My new years resolution was to lose 20 pounds by the end of summer.

I've only got 30 pounds to go.

I've just made the best recipe for tofu ever!

Simply brush generously with extra virgin olive oil before lightly tossing it in the bin. 

"Look, I've found a bottle of Cherry Coke with your name on it," I said to my son Litre.

I caught my wife hard at it with the window cleaner today.

I said to her, "What's the fucking point in paying him if you're gonna help clean the windows."

As she slowly eased the cucumber into my arse, it got me thinking...

I won't ask for help with packing the shopping again.

^^^ wot he said  ^^^

 

[Just One More]

I was walking down the street with my wife earlier when she accused me of being ashamed to be seen with her. “That’s total bollocks” I replied, by text, from across the road.

[Baldy]

I was walking down the street with my wife earlier when she accused me of being ashamed to be seen with her. “That’s total bollocks” I replied, by text, from across the road.

 

[Steve]

I was walking down the street with my wife earlier when she accused me of being ashamed to be seen with her. “That’s total bollocks” I replied, by text, from across the road.