I saw Cliff Richard in my local Chinese takeaway recently. The owner said to him, "You sing my favourite song I give you free meal!" Cliff replied, "Sure, what do you want to hear?" The man said, "itchy sore fanny!" Cliff looked confused and said, "Sorry, that's not one of my songs" "Yes" said the man.
"Itchy sore fanny how we don't talk anymore!....