Author Topic: Your name, please?  (Read 2478 times)

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Offline Pastis

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Your name, please?
« on: May 26, 2009, 03:16:29 PM »
Having a surname that I usually have to pronounce two or three times, then spell out to the person enquiring, I have taken for many a year to using a more common name to make things easier. It's simpler, less time consuming and all in all a safer bet  angel1

I only use this technique on trivial, unimportant things like ordering a take-away, the dry cleaning, shoe repairs etc and now most of the regularly used services know me by my alter ego... simples  8)

Not this afternoon however  Banghead. A new employee at the dry cleaners  eeek: It went something like this:

Is name, please?
Walker
Wok?
Walker
Sorrys, spell him, please?
W A L K
W?
Yes
O?
A
K?
No L!
WOL?
No! WAL
Ok. then?
K
8?
K!!
A?
K!!!!
Ah K... sorrys
E
P?
E!!
D?
E!!!!!!!!
E?
YES!!!!
R
UR?
R!!
Oh.... R.... thanks you, Meester Woker


FFS.... Why do I bother?  Shrugs:
Like the Buddhist said to the hot dog vendor...
"Make me one with everything"

Offline Nick

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Re: Your name, please?
« Reply #1 on: May 26, 2009, 03:19:56 PM »
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: Your name, please?
« Reply #2 on: May 26, 2009, 03:26:43 PM »
Oh dear!
I have suffered from the fact that there are two acceptable ways to spell my surname and many more to misunderstand it. God knows why but many people hear it as Morris (which it is not) so I thought I had solved the problem by saying "As in Arabia" after giving the name (OK so now you've worked it out). Anyway this worked quite well until one day I said it and the guy writing it down stuck his tongue out of the corner of his mouth and carefully printed Mr O'Toole.  ::)
« Last Edit: May 26, 2009, 03:44:28 PM by Snoopy »
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Offline Pastis

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Re: Your name, please?
« Reply #3 on: May 26, 2009, 03:32:38 PM »
What if he'd written Mr Sharif?  eeek:   ;)
Like the Buddhist said to the hot dog vendor...
"Make me one with everything"

Offline Snoopy

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Re: Your name, please?
« Reply #4 on: May 26, 2009, 03:40:29 PM »
What if he'd written Mr Sharif?  eeek:   ;)

Or "Cairo Fred" as Harry Secombe and Peter Sellers used to call him.
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Offline Barman

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Re: Your name, please?
« Reply #5 on: May 26, 2009, 06:23:04 PM »
I used to work with a guy that couldn't pronounce his own name...

It was 'Dave' but he couldn't do the 'vee' sound... it came out 'wee'...

So listening to him on the phone was hilarious...

Call Centre: What is your name
Him: Daweee
Call Centre: Can you spell that?
Him: D. A. WEE. E.
Call Centre: Dawee?
Him: No, Dawee
Call Centre: Dawee?
Him: No, Dawee
Call Centre: Can you spell that?
Him: D. A. WEE. E.
Call Centre: Dawee?
Etc.

Hilarious!  lol:
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: Your name, please?
« Reply #6 on: May 26, 2009, 06:26:02 PM »
As Dr David Bellamy once said "Only an idiot would marry someone called Rosemary when they cannot say the letter R" as he introduced his wife "Wosemawy"
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Offline Pastis

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Re: Your name, please?
« Reply #7 on: May 26, 2009, 06:32:37 PM »
Imagine the mirth when Col. and Mrs Clive Bottham announced the arrival of their daughter, Ophelia  eeek:
Like the Buddhist said to the hot dog vendor...
"Make me one with everything"

Offline Snoopy

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Re: Your name, please?
« Reply #8 on: May 26, 2009, 06:39:19 PM »
We'll be playing Mornington Crescent next.

What think we of three guest hosts to replace Humph in the new series? Stephen Fry, Jack Dee and ....... errrrr...... someone I have never heard of will be taking it in turns apparently. Stephen Fry says it was an awesome experience that he had serious doubts about but the "Team" carried it off. Also new member of the panel is Victoria Wood and those that have seen her in it at the recording say she is brilliant..
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Pastis

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Re: Your name, please?
« Reply #9 on: May 26, 2009, 06:57:31 PM »
I'd look forward to any of those three guesting it. My choice, had I the influence, would be Barry Humphries (as himself, obviously).
Urbane, witty, eloquent, slightly tired but still wickedly satirical.
Like the Buddhist said to the hot dog vendor...
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Offline Barman

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Re: Your name, please?
« Reply #10 on: May 26, 2009, 06:59:01 PM »
Can any of them play the trumpet...?
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: Your name, please?
« Reply #11 on: May 26, 2009, 07:00:16 PM »
I'd look forward to any of those three guesting it. My choice, had I the influence, would be Barry Humphries (as himself, obviously).
Urbane, witty, eloquent, slightly tired but still wickedly satirical.


Did you catch him on Desert Island Discs earlier in the week? Lovely man. He wants to write his own obit to ensure there is no mention of Edna.  ;D
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Pastis

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Re: Your name, please?
« Reply #12 on: May 26, 2009, 07:01:35 PM »
Can any of them play the trumpet...?

Does the pink oboe count?
Like the Buddhist said to the hot dog vendor...
"Make me one with everything"

Offline Snoopy

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Re: Your name, please?
« Reply #13 on: May 26, 2009, 07:02:11 PM »
Can any of them play the trumpet...?

Does the pink oboe count?


Tsk!
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Offline Barman

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Re: Your name, please?
« Reply #14 on: May 26, 2009, 07:05:27 PM »
Can any of them play the trumpet...?

Does the pink oboe count?
noooo:
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