Cheering up tube passengers

[Miss Demeanour]

Drivers on London Underground trains have started reading out quotes from thinkers like Jean-Paul Sartre and Mahatma Gandhi in a bid to cheer up passengers, officials said Thursday.

As well as the usual announcements urging passengers to "mind the gap" and warning of delays, tube drivers are now also quoting philosophy over the public announcement system

The quotes include "Everyone should be respected, but no-one idolised" (Albert Einstein), "An ounce of action is worth a ton of theory" (Friedrich Engels) and "Nothing is worth more than this day" (Johann von Goethe)


Well that is bound to improve passenger's temperaments on the tube - it is normally such a pleasant experience anyway that a bit of ideological thinking is bound to be a big success  

[Nick]

I could let them use 'I am surrounded by idiots (Discuss)' -  to break the ice, like

[Miss Demeanour]

Do you actually have copyright on that phrase then 

[Nick]

Um, probably 

[Barman]

Um, probably 

That's a no then... 

[Nick]

Just imagine it. A hot and sweaty day on teh Northern Line. Overcrowded. Delays.

Train driver says: 'I am surrounded by idiots, as Mr Nick so wisely says.'

There could be a really good fight 

[Miss Demeanour]

Then he goes on to play a piece of music by some cat ....by the time the train pulls into the next station there will be a mass evacuation  

[Nick]

And free cakes!

[Pastis]

They were thinking of using Sartre's "Hell is other people" but ... 

[Miss Demeanour]

Can you imagine  - hell is more like the lack of air con on the tubes.

I got on the Victoria line at 7 o clock in the morning today and as soon as I stepped on the train was faced with a wall of heat - thank heavens it was an empty train - really is bloody unpleasant 

[Bar Wench]

Can you imagine  - hell is more like the lack of air con on the tubes.

I got on the Victoria line at 7 o clock in the morning today and as soon as I stepped on the train was faced with a wall of heat - thank heavens it was an empty train - really is bloody unpleasant 

And there you have reason number one why I refuse to work in town. 

[barmisspah?]

So who is supposed to be driving the train while they are reading out this shit
drivel. ?

[Nick]

Perhaps they let passengers have a go to satisfy their childhood dream of being a train driver 

[Miss Demeanour]

They will sort that out during the next tube strike when they have to rewrite their job descriptions to include a competency of being able to read  

[Barman]

I reckon they drive themselves anyway - the 'driver' only being there to give the public confidence...

Do you know how they go round corners by the way - fascinating!