Fantastic Headlines

[Barman]

Don't try this at home

 

[Just One More]

He won't be tossing anything for a while then 

[Nick]

 

[Darwins Selection]

He won't be tossing anything for a while then 

[Just One More]

Tortoise fitted with wheels

You'd just have to do that thing with it that we did as kids with toy cars when you ran it forward a few times while holding it then released it so it went faster 

And what's this all about, ".... inheriting the pet from a previous owner who said they could not cope" 

[Nick]

I still do that with my toy cars 

[Darwins Selection]

a previous owner who said they could not cope"

Indeed, tortoises can be very demanding. 

[Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons)]

'Mr Jackson has owned Yuri for 40 years, inheriting the pet from a previous owner who said they could not cope.

He and his wife also own horses, chickens, two dogs and a parrot.

Yuri's favourite foods include strawberries, bananas and brown bread.'


Let's hope Mr Jackson does not decide to fit wheels to the rest of his animals.

I had a tortoise as a pet when I was a child. She, for her name was Dumbella, was an escape artist and we once had to go and fetch her/it from about half a mile away.  The finders being able to phone us because my father had the sense to paint our phone number on the underside of it after about the third escape. 

my father could cope no longer and he drilled a hole through the back of it's shell through which he tied string. I was not sad enough to take it for a walk, but it was tied to the rotary drier. It was a long length of string obviously.

[Just One More]

... my father could cope no longer and he drilled a hole through the back of it's shell through which he tied string. I was not sad enough to take it for a walk, but it was tied to the rotary drier. It was a long length of string obviously.

Why do I have this image of a windy day, sheets on the rotary drier and a tortoise whizzing round at 30mph 

[Darwins Selection]

'Mr Jackson has owned Yuri for 40 years, inheriting the pet from a previous owner who said they could not cope.

He and his wife also own horses, chickens, two dogs and a parrot.

Yuri's favourite foods include strawberries, bananas and brown bread.'


Let's hope Mr Jackson does not decide to fit wheels to the rest of his animals.

I had a tortoise as a pet when I was a child. She, for her name was Dumbella, was an escape artist and we once had to go and fetch her/it from about half a mile away.  The finders being able to phone us because my father had the sense to paint our phone number on the underside of it after about the third escape. 

my father could cope no longer and he drilled a hole through the back of it's shell through which he tied string. I was not sad enough to take it for a walk, but it was tied to the rotary drier. It was a long length of string obviously.

 

[Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons)]

... my father could cope no longer and he drilled a hole through the back of it's shell through which he tied string. I was not sad enough to take it for a walk, but it was tied to the rotary drier. It was a long length of string obviously.

Why do I have this image of a windy day, sheets on the rotary drier and a tortoise whizzing round at 30mph 

 

Funny you should say that JOM but it would go round  in circles and it wore a sort of path in the grass. One day my sister and I were at home she was upstairs shagging her boyfriend my mother came home early from work. I hurriedly ushered her outside to inspect the tortoise track whilst BF did a bunk. 

My mother thought I was bonkers, she has never treated me the same since.

I didn't get much thanks from my sister and BF either.   Poor poor used Dumbella.

It was for her own good DS.




 

[Barman]

 

[bodiam]

did your mum use it - hamster in a wheel like- to dry her washing on a still day- all be it very slowly. And too bad if the tortoise wanted to go one way and the wind blew the rotary line the other way.   

[Barman]

did your mum use it - hamster in a wheel like- to dry her washing on a still day- all be it very slowly. And too bad if the tortoise wanted to go one way and the wind blew the rotary line the other way.   

Got it right second time... 

I like the idea of giving the poor thing maryjuana leaves or summat and creating the world's largest spin dryer... 

[Nick]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-14705328