Fantastic Headlines

[Barman]

Call to ban all lap dancing clubs and sex shops in Nottingham

We can expect Nick to be spending more time in here then... 

[Baldy]

Call to ban all lap dancing clubs and sex shops in Nottingham

We can expect Nick to be spending more time in here then... 

By the standard if his typing I think he gets home visits, so it should not affect him.

[Snoopy]

Tax fizzy drinks and ban junk food ads, say doctors

Not content with having TV ads against smoking and booze these b@st@rds now want to tax cola and Big Macs out of business.

Why can't they just get on and cure somebody?

[Barman]

Tax fizzy drinks and ban junk food ads, say doctors

Not content with having TV ads against smoking and booze these b@st@rds now want to tax cola and Big Macs out of business.

Why can't they just get on and cure somebody?

Indeed, the amount of people that die from them (and booze and fags for that matter) is far fewer than are slaughtered under the 'care' of the NHS... 

[Steve]

Tax fizzy drinks and ban junk food ads, say doctors

Not content with having TV ads against smoking and booze these b@st@rds now want to tax cola and Big Macs out of business.

Why can't they just get on and cure somebody?

doctors.   They must have shares in that shite aspartame that makes me sick

[Barman]

Tax fizzy drinks and ban junk food ads, say doctors

Not content with having TV ads against smoking and booze these b@st@rds now want to tax cola and Big Macs out of business.

Why can't they just get on and cure somebody?

They said on the wireless at lunchtime that 'two tins of fizzy drink are as bad for you as a packet of fags'* 









* There was probably a 'could be' or 'possibly' in there too... 

[Steve]

They said on the wireless at lunchtime that 'two tins of fizzy drink are as bad for you as a packet of fags'* 

 . . .

Well they are if dropped on you from a passing whirlycopper - seemples

[Barman]

They said on the wireless at lunchtime that 'two tins of fizzy drink are as bad for you as a packet of fags'* 

 . . .

Well they are if dropped on you from a passing whirlycopper - seemples

Much worserer in that case! 

[Just One More]

Call to ban all lap dancing clubs and sex shops in Nottingham

We can expect Nick to be spending more time in here then... 

No more Chippendales etc then, or is that "just a bit of fun" 

[Grumpmeister]

Perhaps I'm being uncharitable here but how feckin stupid would someone have to be to leave a canister of radioactive material in their van parked outside their bloody house overnight? 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2280499/Canister-potentially-dangerous-radioactive-material-stolen-van-parked-outside-house.html

[apc2010]

Meanwhile, French fashion house Thierry Mugler has become the latest high-profile sponsor to distance itself from Oscar Pistorius as the Paralympian fights murder charges.
The company will withdraw all products featuring Pistorius, including its ’A*men Pure Shot’ fragrance


Read more: http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/4802187/Oscar-Pistorius-breaks-down-at-bail-hearing.html#ixzz2LM2jVljR

 

[Pastis]

Fantastic!     I am advised to go back to university ... get a loan and never pay it back 

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/education/universityeducation/9884301/Over-60s-are-told-go-back-to-university-and-retrain.html

[apc2010]

You can't make this shit up...............Oscars manager is called...............wait for it...........






Ampie Louw.............................

[Barman]

You can't make this shit up...............Oscars manager is called...............wait for it...........






Ampie Louw.............................

 

[Grumpmeister]

Do you think you can be done for trying to escape and kerb crawling at the same time. 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2285241/Disqualified-driver-tried-outrun-police-helicopter-patrol-cars-MOPED-travelling-just-15mph.html