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Author Topic: The all new schoolboy humour thread  (Read 951 times)

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Offline Snoopy

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The all new schoolboy humour thread
« on: September 04, 2009, 04:25:06 PM »
Do you remember those silly schoolboy jokes that one wrote on a piece of paper and asked someone unsuspecting to read out loud.

"Polish it behind the door" was one and I also remember "Well Oil Beef Hooked"


Very third form I know but hilarious when you are that age.

Got any more?
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Offline Nick

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Re: The all new schoolboy humour thread
« Reply #1 on: September 04, 2009, 05:12:56 PM »
All too soon I fear I will  noooo:
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Offline Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons)

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Re: The all new schoolboy humour thread
« Reply #2 on: September 05, 2009, 06:57:28 PM »
Two parrots were sitting on a perch, one turned to the other and said 'can you smell fish'  silly I know but it makes me giggle like a school girl. noooo:
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Offline Miss Demeanour

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Re: The all new schoolboy humour thread
« Reply #3 on: September 05, 2009, 07:06:43 PM »
I remember that one  lol:
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: The all new schoolboy humour thread
« Reply #4 on: September 05, 2009, 07:13:55 PM »
 lol: lol:

YES! That's the sort of thing.
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Offline TG

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Re: The all new schoolboy humour thread
« Reply #5 on: September 06, 2009, 10:09:44 AM »
Quote from: Miss Creant on September 05, 2009, 06:57:28 PM
Two parrots were sitting on a perch, one turned to the other and said 'can you smell fish'  silly I know but it makes me giggle like a school girl. noooo:

By god that made me laugh.  ;D
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Offline Darwins Selection

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Re: The all new schoolboy humour thread
« Reply #6 on: September 06, 2009, 11:18:31 AM »
What goes black, white, black, white, black, white, red?

















A nun being run over on a pedestrian crossing.
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: The all new schoolboy humour thread
« Reply #7 on: September 06, 2009, 11:30:32 AM »
Q. What's brown and come steaming out of Cows backwards?

A. A Red Funnel Ferry



It really works better if you say it because we all know that Cowes has an e in it but would ruin the pun if written correctly.

This joke was very big in Southampton where of course the Red Funnel Ferry is the known link to Cowes, IoW.
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Offline Pirate

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Re: The all new schoolboy humour thread
« Reply #8 on: September 06, 2009, 02:44:30 PM »
Quote from Mission Impossible

"I'm looking for Mike Hunt. He's my brother. Now tell me where Mike Hunt is, or I'll blow your fucking head off"!

I think there was a similar line in Top Gun
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: The all new schoolboy humour thread
« Reply #9 on: September 06, 2009, 02:51:39 PM »
The Groundsman at Lord's Cricket Ground is (and has been for some years) one Mick Hunt. Everyone on the radio "TMS" team is very careful with that and all are scrupulously careful to refer to him as Mick but one of the Aussie commentators who they imported for the recent Ashes series made the classic error during his "between overs link" and referred to Mike Hunt. Whether he'd been set up or was just bloody silly I don't know but the commentary box exploded with laughter.  lol:
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Offline Barman

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Re: The all new schoolboy humour thread
« Reply #10 on: September 06, 2009, 06:17:25 PM »
Q. What is black and white and read all over?

A. A newspaper!  drumroll:












That one doesn't work written down either...  noooo:
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Offline Just One More

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Re: The all new schoolboy humour thread
« Reply #11 on: September 08, 2009, 09:17:36 AM »
What's brown and sticky... a stick

Two fish in a tank, one said to the other, "can you drive this thing"

Two snakes chatting in the zoo, "here, are we them snakes that squeeze people until their eyeballs go bang, or are we the ones that bite people and poison them?"
"I dont know... why?"
"I've just bit my bloody tongue"
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Offline barmisspah?

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Re: The all new schoolboy humour thread
« Reply #12 on: September 08, 2009, 09:36:25 AM »
Boy is sent to the shops by his mum, goes into the bakers & asks for a brown loaf & a white loaf. Baker says 'Sorry we've only got white left' boy replies 'That's ok I've got my bike outside'.

Don't know why but it still makes me laugh
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Offline Nick

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Re: The all new schoolboy humour thread
« Reply #13 on: September 09, 2009, 09:04:41 AM »
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Offline Barman

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Re: The all new schoolboy humour thread
« Reply #14 on: September 09, 2009, 09:08:09 AM »
No...  noooo:
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