Well as we already have a thread for films and books we would recommend I thought it was time to have one for the absolute garbage that we wouldnt want to inflict on someone we couldnt stand.
To kick the thread off we have Far Cry, a Uwe Boll film based upon the Ubisoft game. Now as Rare can attest its safe to say that I have a low opinion of this guy's films to date. All of them have been bloody awful game conversions, the first one, House of the Dead, even included footage from the arcade game in order to save money but anyway, on with Far Cry.
The plot is standard B movie wannabe fare, Jack Carver, a former member of the German Special Forces takes the journalist Valerie Cardinal to an island to visit her uncle Max who is working in a military complex on the island. As they arrive Valerie gets captured by the minions of Doctor Krieger. Jack does not care about her until his boat explodes. After the destruction of his boat Jack finds out about the true purpose of the facilities on the island, which is the creation of genetically modified soldiers.
Now to be fair, if I hadn't played the game I would have just considered it standard Sky3 late night naff film fare but with the degree he butchered the plot he may as well have just changed the character names and renamed the film 'The Island of Doctor Moronic'. From small things like why change the nationality of the lead character, after all Jack Carver sounds like such a German name. and compared to the original scientist plotline 'Uncle Max' is utterly bland. And what the hell was Boll smoking when he decided it would be a good idea to have a lard arsed 'food delivery guy' added to the plot as one of the heroes. The game plotline had the potential to make a decent film but all this hatchet job has accomplished is a late night waste of time. Now call me a picky bugger but surely if you make a film based upon a book or a game then you try and make it as close to the plot as you can.
Boll you utter, utter, utter, utter, utter talentless arsehole, I am now off to find that online petiton to stop him ever making another film.
