How many times...

[Pastis]

Since the middle of August I've been working with a new client that has all the makings of a 'nice little earner'. They're pleasant enough in meetings if a bit whacky and quite orderly in their admin.

I've been invited in as a professional resource that can help them get results and provide them with authoritative, tried and tested creative direction. It seems to be falling apart because I refuse to go along with things that cannot, would not work. Email ping pong is hitting record levels as they ask for things that are technically impossible 

How many times do I have to tell them that what they are asking for won't work before throwing in the towel?

[Snoopy]

Just play along and remember to bill them for each reply or part thereof 

[Pastis]

Just play along and remember to bill them for each reply or part thereof 

Yep, seems the only way to play it. 

It's their learning curve not mine after all.... but it's been a long day. 

[Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons)]

 

Wot he said....also I can offer you a large glass of PG if that is of any help.

[Miss Demeanour]

How many times do I have to tell them that what they are asking for won't work before throwing in the towel?

Just the once and then retreat. Once they have seen the error of their ways they will come crawling back.

[Pastis]

Like that character in Allo Allo?  "Leeesten carefully; ah weel say zees only once!"

I sent a third, longer email last night explaining even more pedantically why what they wanted could not be produced 

[Darwins Selection]

Like that character in Allo Allo?  "Leeesten carefully; ah weel say zees only once!"

I sent a third, longer email last night explaining even more pedantically why what they wanted could not be produced 

I bet it took just over an hour to type. 

[Pastis]

Like that character in Allo Allo?  "Leeesten carefully; ah weel say zees only once!"

I sent a third, longer email last night explaining even more pedantically why what they wanted could not be produced 

I bet it took just over an hour to type. 

 

At last they have relented  , and we seem to be progressing

I've been trying to think of an analogy to illustrate the frustration. Imagine, if you will that I run a Fish & Chip shop, beautifully cooked, lots of variety ~ the finest etc etc. In walks the customer and asks for Fish & Chips, no problem says I, we have some lovely cod, will that do? Oh yes, says the customer. Fine, it'll be with you in two minutes; chips and peas with that? Oh yes please.

As I'm wrapping the fish & chips there's a comment from the customer...

Er, actually, we wanted a pizza. Can you make it look like a pizza? Cos that's what we really wanted....

Excuse me? You asked for fish & chips, yes?

Yes, but we wanted a pizza really. Can you make it look like a pizza?

   

[Snoopy]

Man walks into the fish n chip shop and says "Have you got 'Ghost' starring Patrick Swazey?"
"No" says the man behind the counter "The video shop is two doors down"

Following day the man is back "Have you got 'Educating Rita' with Michael Caine?"
"No" says the man behind the counter "The video shop is two doors down"


Following day the man is back "Have you got 'Superman II' starring Christopher Reeve?"
"No" says the man behind the counter "The video shop is two doors down"

Following day the man is back "Have you got 'Godfather' with Marlon Brando?"
"No" says the man behind the counter "The video shop is two doors down"

Following day the man is back and before he can say a word the guy behind the counter says
"Before you fvcking start this is a chip shop, we don't sell videos we only sell fish n chips"
and the man says ................

.........................

.....................

................

...........

.........

"Have you got a Fish called Wanda?"












No ~ I don't know why I typed that either 

[Uncle Mort]

I guess because in Pastis' analogy he should have sent them to Dominos two doors down.

[Snoopy]

  Cause and effect you reckon eh?

[Pastis]

I guess because in Pastis' analogy he should have sent them to Dominos two doors down.

As long as they pay for the Fish & Chips they ordered 

[Uncle Mort]

I guess because in Pastis' analogy he should have sent them to Dominos two doors down.

As long as they pay for the Fish & Chips they ordered 

And then sell them to the next customer. 

[Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons)]

Man walks into the fish n chip shop and says "Have you got 'Ghost' starring Patrick Swazey?"
"No" says the man behind the counter "The video shop is two doors down"

Following day the man is back "Have you got 'Educating Rita' with Michael Caine?"
"No" says the man behind the counter "The video shop is two doors down"


Following day the man is back "Have you got 'Superman II' starring Christopher Reeve?"
"No" says the man behind the counter "The video shop is two doors down"

Following day the man is back "Have you got 'Godfather' with Marlon Brando?"
"No" says the man behind the counter "The video shop is two doors down"

Following day the man is back and before he can say a word the guy behind the counter says
"Before you fvcking start this is a chip shop, we don't sell videos we only sell fish n chips"
and the man says ................

.........................

.....................

................

...........

.........

"Have you got a Fish called Wanda?"












No ~ I don't know why I typed that either 

Man walks into a fish and chip shop just before closing time and asks 'have you got any chips left?' bloke behind the counter says 'oh yes' 1st chap says 'you shouldn't have cooked so many then' and walked out.

[Pastis]

Man walks into a fish and chip shop just before closing time and asks 'have you got any chips left?' bloke behind the counter says 'oh yes' 1st chap says 'you shouldn't have cooked so many then' and walked out.

Hat, coat, door MissC