The all new "Where are you today?" thread

[Snoopy]

MOD Procurement did it to me twice .... both times £5m p.a. contracts. Securing a mothballed USAF base doesn't come cheap.

Trouble is you have to respond. Saying "FOOK OFF" is not an option.

[Pastis]

Mine wasn't nearly as complex as that; the bloke who asked me to do something just wasn't familiar with the processes involved. It turned out that he already had the files in the right format ~ he just didn't know it  

Still, he's mightily grateful which no doubt scores brownie points for later  

[Snoopy]

I hope he remembers.

One who turned me over like that was too embarrassed to come back.

[Nick]

I've had that. But I got my revenge 

[Pastis]

He appears to be a new boy in a company I've dealt with for years so I think it'll be fine.

[Darwins Selection]

I thought I was going to be very busy today but fear I have just talked myself out of a job by offering good advice 

1. Always record phone conversations for later transcription.

2. After the initial "I was wondering if you could help" question, always chuckle and say "I charge £500 per hour (or part thereof) for such a service"

They may choose to treat it as a joke, but you have entered into a verbal contract which you may disregard or invoke later, depending on how shafted you feel.
 

[Nick]

Pastis may dimly recall my "free" initial visit to the alarmingly named Fawkham House School. They are no more 

[Snoopy]

I thought I was going to be very busy today but fear I have just talked myself out of a job by offering good advice 

1. Always record phone conversations for later transcription.

2. After the initial "I was wondering if you could help" question, always chuckle and say "I charge £500 per hour (or part thereof) for such a service"

They may choose to treat it as a joke, but you have entered into a verbal contract which you may disregard or invoke later, depending on how shafted you feel.
 

Pastis may now expect an invoice for "Legal Advice" from DS 

[Pastis]

 


       

[Nick]

Well my sis with the mushrooms in her lungs has been sent home today, so I will shortly be off to NOttingham to see her and spend an overnight in an hotel and then see MIss NOttingham 

[Miss Demeanour]

Where over things will mushroom 

[tel]

Gym done, garden done, neighbours prescription collected.

Now looking up stuff for interview next Tuesday, shock horror.

P/T, up at the Angel, not a part of the world I really remember.

[Nick]

Where over things will mushroom 

Wash yer mouth out!

[Pastis]

   That could be a long commute.

[Nick]

I have just been informed that I am now a Great Great Uncle