The all new "Where are you today?" thread

[Steve]

She is NUTS!!

I got there at 8.15 as requested but she was early and was standing in the entrance lobby of the flats.

Nod appeared and said, "Ah, Dr. Nick..."

Mad woman: What sort of doctor are you? Medical or other?
Me: Who are you and why do you want to know?
Her: Well what do you want? Spit it out!
Me: I have come to visit him. (I gesture in Nod's direction). Why do you ask?
She  looks affronted
Her: We can't just let anyone in ....
Nod: He is not just anyone. He is a friend of mine. It is nothing to do with you.
Her: I am quite within my rights.............

Nod and I retreat to the safety of his kitchen and I give her "a look" on the way past.

Nod reveals that she, as the leaseholder of one of the four flats in the block, had appeared at the door of one of the other residents on Saturday.

Her: You are very old (the resident is 90 and has terminal cancer) and will die soon. I need a set of keys and the names of your executors.
Old lady (who is "prim"): Fuck off. (Slams door)

I can see why Nod wanted back up!!

Excellent work Dr Nick 

When is escipode 2 due?

[Nick]

Probably later today, but I will not be there. I expect a bulletin. 

The saga is ongoing 

[Barman]

She is NUTS!!

I got there at 8.15 as requested but she was early and was standing in the entrance lobby of the flats.

Nod appeared and said, "Ah, Dr. Nick..."

Mad woman: What sort of doctor are you? Medical or other?
Me: Who are you and why do you want to know?
Her: Well what do you want? Spit it out!
Me: I have come to visit him. (I gesture in Nod's direction). Why do you ask?
She  looks affronted
Her: We can't just let anyone in ....
Nod: He is not just anyone. He is a friend of mine. It is nothing to do with you.
Her: I am quite within my rights.............

Nod and I retreat to the safety of his kitchen and I give her "a look" on the way past.

Nod reveals that she, as the leaseholder of one of the four flats in the block, had appeared at the door of one of the other residents on Saturday.

Her: You are very old (the resident is 90 and has terminal cancer) and will die soon. I need a set of keys and the names of your executors.
Old lady (who is "prim"): Fuck off. (Slams door)

I can see why Nod wanted back up!!

[Miss Demeanour]

 

Why on earth does she think she has this authority - is she headleaseholder or anything ? What does she want ?


Otherwise tell her to sod right off 

[Nick]

She is nuts.

[Miss Demeanour]

Yes but  so is everyone else if they are allowing her in their homes .

Why did Nod agree ?

[Nick]

No, there's a common entrance area. Nod won't let her in and nor will the others.

[Miss Demeanour]

So they had a prearranged meeting in the hallway to talk about nothing in particular when she started acting like a  guard dog  and you both retreated ?

 

[Nick]

No, she is so nuts that he was afraid she was going to accuse him of sexual assault and he wanted me as a witness (not to the assault, obviously  )  See?

[Steve]

No, she is so nuts that he was afraid she was going to accuse him of sexual assault and he wanted me as a witness (not to the assault, obviously  )  See?

And got to give Nod credit for coming up with that 'Dr Nick' line

[Miss Demeanour]

There's a lot of that sexual assault stuff going on ....don't you just have to say

"I'm sorry I commented on your nuts" and it will all be ok 

[Nick]

No, she is so nuts that he was afraid she was going to accuse him of sexual assault and he wanted me as a witness (not to the assault, obviously  )  See?

And got to give Nod credit for coming up with that 'Dr Nick' line

It did rattle here, I can see in retrospect. He is correct though 

[Barman]

Shopping in Limassol... 

[Nick]

Hospital
"Office"

[Steve]

Avoiding Bluewater