You could try the dishwasher ~ they get very hot.
I am told one can cook a salmon in a dishwasher ~ not that I have tried as I suspect it will taste a bit "soapy".
I have cooked kippers on an engine block ~ the bride was really pissed off with us for that one ....... but if you will have the reception at the Rugby Club what can you expect?
Oh good grief this brings back memories...
When I lived in Wales was invited to a wedding, reception held in the local rugby club.
I had just had daughter number three she was about two weeks old.
The bride was captivated and had numerous pictures taken of her holding the baby.
We left when the first fight broke out.