The all new "Where are you today?" thread

[Barman]

I was honoured, he let me drive his new car home from Worcester. 

Had a drink had he? 

He drank coffee and I had coke.   

Frothy coffee...? 

[Tipsy Gipsy]

 

[Barman]

Wot?

[tel]

I have finally found a radio station that isn't slavishly playing that Michael Bubble one-hit crap, or that awful wailing of that cat squatting harpie that screams N York, N York in usch a tuneless manner.

[Grumpmeister]

If you are on about Alicia keys I prefer the welsh version of her song, if only for the  novelty value. 

[Nick]

Speaking of keys, I am now waiting in for the locksmiths who are coming to change all he external locks here to prevent further access by laydees of the night. So all my neighbours will get home tonight to find themselves locked out 

[Barman]

Speaking of keys, I am now waiting in for the locksmiths who are coming to change all he external locks here to prevent further access by laydees of the night. So all my neighbours will get home tonight to find themselves locked out 

So you told us... 

Anyhoo  , quite an evening here.

Despite this being one of the posher areas of Nottingham it is, historically, an area where young laydees patrol the streets and (cough) satisfy passing motorists.

One of these young laydees seems to have acquired keys to the flats from one of the builders and has been letting herself in at all hours to (cough) give them a seeing to on the stairs 

I found her last night and the neighbours found her this evening. Had to dial 999 and tomorrow all the locks are being changed, which should be fun as I am the only one here and will have to then let all the others in (including the svelte redhead from number 5  ) when they get back from werk, like 

[Nick]

I am just keeping you abreast of progress, like 

[Barman]

I am just keeping you abreast of progress, like 

You forgot you posted it! 

[Nick]

No    How could I forget the police visit and the discovery of dodgy laydees outside my front door you great muppet?

[Barman]

No    How could I forget the police visit and the discovery of dodgy laydees outside my front door you great muppet?

Spongehead! 

[Nick]

You are just jealous that I lead such an exciting life 

[Barman]

You are just jealous that I lead such an exciting life 

Oh yes, that must be it... 









I aspire to being an unpaid doorman... 

[GROWLER]

Speaking of keys, I am now waiting in for the locksmiths who are coming to change all he external locks here to prevent further access by laydees of the night. So all my neighbours will get home tonight to find themselves locked out 

So you told us... 

Anyhoo  , quite an evening here.

Despite this being one of the posher areas of Nottingham it is, historically, an area where young laydees patrol the streets and (cough) satisfy passing motorists.

One of these young laydees seems to have acquired keys to the flats from one of the builders and has been letting herself in at all hours to (cough) give them a seeing to on the stairs 

I found her last night and the neighbours found her this evening. Had to dial 999 and tomorrow all the locks are being changed, which should be fun as I am the only one here and will have to then let all the others in (including the svelte redhead from number 5  ) when they get back from werk, like 

^^^^, bar BM's comments, wha'ever.

[GROWLER]

Just been to do a job in Chester that was booked in for me last Thursday specifically for today, monday 01/11/10.

You wonder why I flip sometimes?
The useless gormless bone idle thoughtless incompitant 'stealer' forgot to tell the customer about the arrangement, but suggested I could go to her house, 40 miles away in Shropshire........