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Author Topic: The all new "Where are you today?" thread  (Read 3512574 times)

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Offline Nick

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Re: The all new "Where are you today?" thread
« Reply #17820 on: March 30, 2012, 02:16:32 PM »
And a quarter welsh  noooo:
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Re: The all new "Where are you today?" thread
« Reply #17821 on: March 30, 2012, 04:04:46 PM »
I'm back here like!  eeek:
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Offline Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons)

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Re: The all new "Where are you today?" thread
« Reply #17822 on: March 30, 2012, 06:49:29 PM »
I am still not in Venice. noooo:
I have always thought that the worst thing about drowning was having to call 'help!' You must look such a fool. It's put me against drowning.
J Basil Boothroyd

Offline Darwins Selection

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Re: The all new "Where are you today?" thread
« Reply #17823 on: March 30, 2012, 08:27:12 PM »
I mostly despair

Offline Just One More

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Re: The all new "Where are you today?" thread
« Reply #17824 on: March 30, 2012, 08:36:49 PM »
 lol:   drumroll:
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Offline Pirate

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Re: The all new "Where are you today?" thread
« Reply #17825 on: March 30, 2012, 08:51:48 PM »
Well done DS I'd forgot all about this tale... :thumbsup:

For those that don't know...

Twas on the good ship Venus
By Christ you should have seen us
The figurehead was a whore in bed
Sucking a dead man's penis

The captain's name was Lugger
By Christ he was a bugger
He wasn't fit to shovel shit
From one ship to another

And the second mate was Andy
By Christ he had a dandy
Till they crushed his cock on a jagged rock
For cumming in the brandy

The third mate's name was Morgan
By God he was a gorgon
From half past eight he played till late
Upon the captain's organ

The captain's wife was Mabel
And by God was she able
To give the crew their daily screw
Upon the galley table

The captain's daughter Charlotte
Was born and bred a harlot
Her thighs at night were lily white
By morning they were scarlet

The cabin boy was Kipper
By Christ he was a nipper
He stuffed his ass with broken glass
And circumcised the skipper

The captain's lovely daughter
Liked swimming in the water
Delighted squeals came when some eels
Found her sexual quarters

The cook his name was Freeman
And he was a dirty demon
And he fed the crew on menstrual stew
And hymens fried in semen

And the ship's dog was called Rover
And we turned the poor thing over
And ground and ground that faithful hound
From Teneriff to Dover

When we reached our station
Through skillful navigation
The ship got sunk in a wave of spunk
From too much fornication

On the good ship Venus
By Christ you should have seen us
The figurehead was a whore in bed
Sucking a dead man's penis


Offline Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons)

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Re: The all new "Where are you today?" thread
« Reply #17826 on: March 31, 2012, 05:16:14 AM »
 noooo: I don't know.  Oh well it was Friday so time to let your hair down I suppose.  That's assuming you have hair to let down.

I am in bed with a mug of tea listening to the dawn chorus waiting for the sun to rise. cloud9: cloud9:
« Last Edit: March 31, 2012, 06:43:33 AM by Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons) »
I have always thought that the worst thing about drowning was having to call 'help!' You must look such a fool. It's put me against drowning.
J Basil Boothroyd

Offline Just One More

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Re: The all new "Where are you today?" thread
« Reply #17827 on: March 31, 2012, 05:52:36 AM »
noooo: I don't know.  Oh well it was Friday so time to let your hair down I suppose.  That's assuming you have hair to let down.

I am in bed with a mug of tea listening to the dawn chorus waiting for the sun too rise. cloud9: cloud9:

^^^  eyes: ^^^
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons)

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Re: The all new "Where are you today?" thread
« Reply #17828 on: March 31, 2012, 06:45:41 AM »
JOM really nonono: you are naughty but I like you. lol:  Tea?
I have always thought that the worst thing about drowning was having to call 'help!' You must look such a fool. It's put me against drowning.
J Basil Boothroyd

Offline Snoopy

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Re: The all new "Where are you today?" thread
« Reply #17829 on: March 31, 2012, 07:55:54 AM »
"Nat West Cricket Force Weekend" ........ I am looking at the weather and contemplating ducking out of the "All parents and Players are invited to help prepare the ground for the new season" .... as I have no strong desire to attend the ground next to the beach and litter pick, paint sight screens, club-house etc. in the freezing cold.
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline apc2010

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Re: The all new "Where are you today?" thread
« Reply #17830 on: March 31, 2012, 08:45:35 AM »
Could be a long day...................

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Re: The all new "Where are you today?" thread
« Reply #17831 on: March 31, 2012, 09:44:43 AM »
I've been shopping.... maxed the credit card out on cleaning paraphernalia....  redface:
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: The all new "Where are you today?" thread
« Reply #17832 on: March 31, 2012, 10:01:48 AM »
Woodstock wants to go to B and bloody long Q  Banghead


Suddenly painting sight screens looks more attractive.
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

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Re: The all new "Where are you today?" thread
« Reply #17833 on: March 31, 2012, 10:03:48 AM »
Woodstock wants to go to B and bloody long Q  Banghead


Suddenly painting sight screens looks more attractive.

Don't forget to take your own carrier bags - cheap, thieving bastards!  cussing:
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: The all new "Where are you today?" thread
« Reply #17834 on: March 31, 2012, 10:12:44 AM »
Woodstock wants to go to B and bloody long Q  Banghead


Suddenly painting sight screens looks more attractive.

Don't forget to take your own carrier bags - cheap, thieving bastards!  cussing:

All shops (including Take-aways) in Wales charge 5p for each carrier bag ~ by law, no option, you want your stuff in a bag you pay. Alternatively you can juggle with your shopping, five boxes of Chinese food or whatever. Been this way for some time now .... doesn't seem to have lessened the number of empty carrier bags blowing around the streets tho'
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.