The all new "Where are you today?" thread

[Nick]

I got crisp underwear and mineral water 

[GROWLER]

Watch it now...how to gain success with girls?

Errrr, I DO not think so mate.

[GROWLER]

Watch it now.

How to gain her attention.

I don't actually have ANY problems gaining the attention of wimmin.
The type of ettention I receive is another matter however.

[Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons)]

Errr, what's with all the smutty ad's underneath the main feature then ey?

  Until just now.  If I click on on I can find out five secrets that will make girls wild for me.   Knowing my luck it would be Peppa Pig merchandise.


I am now watching the bats that roost in our roof flitting around having a feast.

[GROWLER]

Do this...and she won't say 'no'!
How to Charm a Girl and Flatter Her Into Liking You.

Pickin' the nits out me fur like?

[GROWLER]

Learn this trick...
How To Attract Girls By Doing Almost Nothing

Does that include NOT going to B& longQ on a Sunday morning then?

[Darwins Selection]

I got crisp underwear and mineral water 

I got a Landrover advert. 

[Miss Demeanour]

I got crisp underwear and mineral water 

Underwear made of crisps 

[Nick]

Cheese flavour 

[Tipsy Gipsy]

West Brom today.

[Barman]

I always get watches.... 

[Uncle Mort]

Supermarket, passed a woman on the phone "I'll give his due, at least he didn't get a fucking stranger pregnant, at least it was..."

Then I was out of earshot.

[Barman]

Supermarket, passed a woman on the phone "I'll give his due, at least he didn't get a fucking stranger pregnant, at least it was..."

Then I was out of earshot.

 

[Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons)]

I always get watches.... 

Yes I am sure that you do.....

[Barman]

I always get watches.... 

Yes I am sure that you do.....

 

I am covered in brake fluid....