Basingstoke
Emma the PA just called. I have a problem to deal with on Monday
The natives are all fat and have moustaches. And that's the women.
The males are all stick thin with bad hair and outcrops of wispy beard. There must be a university nearby as they have to be students.
There is a corner occupied by the "God's waiting room" crusty pensioners. And the obligatory pervert looking at porn on his laptop using the free wifi.
Still, could be worse - I could be in Paris. ..