The all new "Where are you today?" thread

[Barman]

Blackberry Island (see also: Lonely Widow) 

They did half the job and fucked-off 'til Monday... 

[apc2010]

Blackberry Island (see also: Lonely Widow) 

They did half the job and fucked-off 'til Monday... 

Also broke the quote ???   or even post ......

[Nick]

A few days up in the Peak District next week and then a lot more days 'pottering'
[/quote

Ooh  lovely. I can recommend some places. It is quite close to me 

[apc2010]

A few days up in the Peak District next week and then a lot more days 'pottering'
[/quote

Ooh  lovely. I can recommend some places. It is quite close to me 

 

[Nick]

BEHOLD! It is the narrow boat "Valhalla", lately famous for the astounding incompetence of its new owners.

It enters the lock and the skipper stands on the roof of the boat.

I advise him that this is NOT a good idea (turbulence), especially as he is not wearing a life jacket.

"I will be fine", he said cheerily

"No, get off the roof and sit in the stern"

OK, he gets his foot caught in the carelessly abandone rope and SPLOSH

"HELP!"

My first water rescue 

He managed to climb up a ladder (sans his mobile phone) and I warned him about the horrors of Weil's Disease 

He was whimpering 

[apc2010]

BEHOLD! It is the narrow boat "Valhalla", lately famous for the astounding incompetence of its new owners.

It enters the lock and the skipper stands on the roof of the boat.

I advise him that this is NOT a good idea (turbulence), especially as he is not wearing a life jacket.

"I will be fine", he said cheerily

"No, get off the roof and sit in the stern"

OK, he gets his foot caught in the carelessly abandone rope and SPLOSH

"HELP!"

My first water rescue 

He managed to climb up a ladder (sans his mobile phone) and I warned him about the horrors of Weil's Disease 

He was whimpering 

 

[Nick]

I was trained up in this by that guy from Mountain Rescue who called himelf Pam and wore a floral frock, wig and high heels. It made the session memorable 

[Steve]

BEHOLD! It is the narrow boat "Valhalla", lately famous for the astounding incompetence of its new owners.

It enters the lock and the skipper stands on the roof of the boat.

I advise him that this is NOT a good idea (turbulence), especially as he is not wearing a life jacket.

"I will be fine", he said cheerily

"No, get off the roof and sit in the stern"

OK, he gets his foot caught in the carelessly abandone rope and SPLOSH

"HELP!"

My first water rescue 

He managed to climb up a ladder (sans his mobile phone) and I warned him about the horrors of Weil's Disease 

He was whimpering 

 

[Steve]

I was trained up in this by that guy from Mountain Rescue who called himelf Pam and wore a floral frock, wig and high heels. It made the session memorable 

[Nick]

Each lock has a "Page a Day" diary for recording incidents. Our friends in Valhalla are present in every one for some insane behaviour. They are stupid.

We have not heard the last of them 

I had a dredger to contend with all day. It made a noise like someone trying to saw a bulldozer in half    It had travelled all the way from Goole and was staffed by a toothless lost tribe of Neanderthals 

[Nick]

 

I was trained up in this by that guy from Mountain Rescue who called himelf Pam and wore a floral frock, wig and high heels. It made the session memorable 

He was a top bloke 

[Steve]

I was trained up in this by that guy from Mountain Rescue who called himelf Pam and wore a floral frock, wig and high heels. It made the session memorable 

He was a top bloke 

once upon a time

[Grumpmeister]

I was trained up in this by that guy from Mountain Rescue who called himelf Pam and wore a floral frock, wig and high heels. It made the session memorable 

Nick's nutter magnet powers are not to be underestimated 

[Steve]

So today we cleared the wild pond of numerous excess water irises

Except the bastard things formed one hopelessly entangled root mass about 4 ft by 4 ft and it weighed a ton.  Had to cut it up in pond with a hand saw and even then it was knackering. And when we'd finished Mr Frog popped up his head to ask 'where's my pond plants gone?'

And yes there were leeches 

. 

[Darwins Selection]

I was trained up in this by that guy from Mountain Rescue who called himelf Pam and wore a floral frock, wig and high heels. It made the session memorable 

He was a top bloke 

Not a bottom bloke then?