Latest teenage rant thread.

[Nick]

There you are Miss D. Name and vehicle. Growler will then consult the chicken entrails

[GROWLER]

What's his name then?You can tell a lot about people from their names, like

Absobloodylutely!

I was going to say his names not ....cough.....please, but I think someone in here has got that christian name. Don't want to upset anyone like.  

[Nick]

Growler and I are as one bear on this. I used to vet a friend's new boyfriends for her. I told her that each one would be a disaster and I was always right 

[GROWLER]

Any'ow, you can't help your christian name. That just provides info on how stoopid his parents are/were, but you DO choose the car you drive, so the car info is much more important like.

Trust us, we know about these man talk type things. 

[Nick]

I bet he shaves his head 

[GROWLER]

Growler and I are as one bear on this. I used to vet a friend's new boyfriends for her. I told her that each one would be a disaster and I was always right 

Well actually that isn't too difficult seeing as the divorce rate is now hovering around the 100% mark.  
We can provide a bit of guidance on how long this latest relationship>>>>marriage will last though, trust us.

[GROWLER]

I bet he shaves his head 

...and uses the sunbed or 'tango rinse' facilty. 

[GROWLER]

Does he keep touching yer arm or paws regulary when he's chatting you up talking to you like? 

[GROWLER]

Gerus a sneaky piccy like please for a fuller and more accurate assessment of suitabilty

Alawys 'appy to 'elp.

[Nick]

Does he keep touching yer arm or paws regulary when he's chatting you up talking to you like? 

It's the elbow touching you have to watch out for, you know 

[GROWLER]

Watch his eyes too when he's talking to you...most most important. Does he fidget when he's talkin' to you, and is he all nervous like?  

[Nick]

That's right Bear. If you ask him a question and he looks to the left while answering it he is deffo lying. Everyone should know this

[Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons)]

Watch his eyes too when he's talking to you...most most important. Does he fidget when he's talkin' to you, and is he all nervous like?  

His eyes will prolly be on Miss D's breasts, not literally that would just be messy, believe me, for I have dissected eyes.

[Nick]

I hope Miss D is taking note of all this useful advice

[GROWLER]

That's right Bear. If you ask him a question and he looks to the left while answering it he is deffo lying. Everyone should know this

Eyes and how sheeples use them are my speciality, oh yes.

You can read the 'whole book' so to speak by eye watching and fidgiting....oh and touching...and cars and names a bit too.

We need to know.
Where TF 's she gone anyway, leaving us dangling around with unanswered important questions.

May and July are bad months for me btw.