Bad chests

[Nick]

Always been my weakness 

Pneumonia (twice)
Pleurisy
Chesty coughs

Now some horrid infection that makes my lungs hurt and makes me cough like a faulty lawnmower 

Off to the doc later to try to get some pills so I can shake it off before Lanzartotty

[Barman]

That'll be the smerking then...

[Miss Demeanour]

 

Do you need some Vick's ?  

[The Moan Ranger]

Why does Tesco make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front?

[Nick]

They are run by keen Darwinists

[GROWLER]

Why does Tesco make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front?

To jog yer memory as you walk past the grapes display.
Never miss a possible sales opportunity.