I am currently typing up the handwritten articles and reports submitted for the next issue of our community magazine and have just sprayed the screen with Jasmine Tea.
From our local parish council:
"It has been brought to our attention that a person, or persons, are clearing up after their dogs but are then tying the bags to the hedgerow, thus making it a very unpleasant sight, and we would please request that they put the bags in the bins provided"There is some background to this story in that for the past 6 years the PC have been waging a war of words, through the pages of the magazine, with locals about dog sh*t and the reluctance of many owners to poop scoop. Local councillors have been hiding in the park and along footpaths with digital cameras trying to catch the culprits (one such snap shot clearly showed a councillor's elderly mother walking her equally elderly dog, pausing whilst it shat and then tottering on, leaving the steaming heap behind. My observation that she probably couldn't bend down to pick it up didn't help matters but in truth the old dear could not. (The dog has since gone to doggy heaven). Anyway an increasingly desperate council have spent large sums on providing doggy bins and paying for them to be emptied (although they are often found to contain nothing a charge is still levied for the service ... it costs £75 per annum for each bin BTW). They have engaged the services of two part time dog wardens in their efforts to clamp down on dog sh*t and posted notices everywhere. They have even persuaded the vicar to include a plea for Poop Scoop Awareness into his Sunday Notices.
AND NOW the hedgerow bordering the local park is decorated with clear plastic bags full o' dog shite
SWWLTBO says I am warped to find it funny .............. I can't help it.
Honest, I tried to keep a straight face when the Chairman and the Clerk came round to ask me to publish the above notice
