Station freebies

[Miss Demeanour]

So coming out of the station this morning I am bombarded with the usual flocks of people gathering round muppets who are giving away freebies.

Trying to swerve past and they tackle you from the wings, thrusting these packets into your face, expecting you to be thankful and grab them  

What are they ?...This bunch of nonsense




Crisp packets could pick general election winner
It might not be quite as scientific as your average Ipsos Mori poll, but packets of crisps could identify the winner of the UK general election 2010.

To mark the run-up to the election on May 6th, crisp manufacturer Real Crisps are producing political packets in the party colours of red, blue and yellow.

The packs - which feature the faces Gordon Brown, David Cameron and Nick Clegg - will then be given away at shopping centres and train stations around the country.

It's hoped the numbers in which they are picked up will show which party leader is the most popular? and not just that Britain has an obesity problem.

 

[Barman]

Free crisps... 

[Nick]

Many years ago I was inveigled into attending an "education and training" exhibition at Waterloo Station. It was to last all afternoon and reach a triumphant climax during rush hour - which it did, although in an unplanned way. On one of the exhibition stands the incentive was a free glass of wine. Unfortunately, during a mid afternoon lull, the , um, lady and gentleman on the stand started to hit the bottle.

Freed of their inhibitions they then retreated behind their stand (pointlessly since it was in the middle of the station concourse  ) to pass the time with some vigorous rumpy pumpy. Needless to say this was caught on CCTV  

They were so energetic in their activities that the exhibition stand collapsed  

[Snoopy]

Didn't there use to be a bakers in Torquay who accurately predicted the outcome of elections by the numbers of differently coloured iced buns they sold over a given period? 


Beats waiting for a train anyway.

[Nick]

 

[tel]

I've never had a freebie at the station. 

[Snoopy]

I remember a WREN I met on Waterloo Station back in 1965   

[Miss Demeanour]

I've never had a freebie at the station. 

Do you want my packet of crisps 

[Barman]

I've never had a freebie at the station. 

Do you want my packet of crisps 

Which colour did you take...? 

[Miss Demeanour]

I have a blue and a yellow one 

[Miss Demeanour]

I need to go back for the red one....OI obviously need a full set in the name of equality 

[Snoopy]

Put her down as an "Undecided" Doris 

[Barman]

I need to go back for the red one....OI obviously need a full set in the name of equality 

Yes, get the red bag, put it on the floor and urinate on it...

Does that help your survey? 

[Miss Demeanour]

Put her down as an "Undecided" Doris 

Oh no ...I am decided

I just love crisps 

[Snoopy]

So do I but they are rather ...errr..... calorific .... don't you think?