Cutting the cheese

[GROWLER]

PLEASE READ THE FOLLOWING VERY CAREFULLY, AS I DON'T WANT ANYBODY GETTING THE WRONG IDEA AS TO WHAT I'M ACTUALLY RANTING ABOUT.  

I like the block of cheese that's in the fridge to be sliced cleanly and neatly, so it fits on my ham butties nice and square.
Looks neat, everything fits snugly and flat, and is the sign of a tidy mind imo.

So why can't the female members of the household, who've been asked POLITELY, and WITHOUT ME LOSING MY RAG, do the same?

The current block of my favourite Red Leicester looks as though it's been attacked with an axe.
This actually does make me very slightly unhappy, sorry.

I now calmly sit back and await for another flaming roasting from a select 3 or 4 regarding my seemingly intolerable bad attitude.

[Nick]

An Axe, you say? 

[The Moan Ranger]

Various things in my kitchen irritate me - the state of the cheese being one of them. Is it hard to wrap it in cling film after use to stop it going hard? No.

It is a kitchen, not a hair studio. So why do the women of the house insist on applying a few last minute touch-ups, scattering long blonde hairs everywhere? And then moan if they get a bit of hair in their fois gras?

Growler - get them to have their "own" cheese and keep yours hidden.

[Snoopy]

Buy them a proper cheese cutter like this



If that doesn't work use the cheese wire to garrote them. 

[Nick]

He needs a proper cheese slicer, like THIS

http://www.hospitalitywholesale.com.au/products/santo-cheese-slicer1.jpg

[Snoopy]

It is a kitchen, not a hair studio. So why do the women of the house insist on applying a few last minute touch-ups, scattering long blonde hairs everywhere? And then moan if they get a bit of hair in their fois gras?

For much the same reason as they keep two thirds of the crockery and glassware in the f'ing bedrooms I expect.
This morning's count. 6 coffee mugs, four tea cups and 14 glasses all under her bed and her hairbrush, lippy and mascara? ~ On the fecking breakfast bar  

[Snoopy]

He needs a proper cheese slicer, like THIS

http://www.hospitalitywholesale.com.au/products/santo-cheese-slicer1.jpg

We have one of those ~ useless!

[The Moan Ranger]

You could always just grate it 

[Snoopy]

We also have one of these, bought in Holland years ago ..... works well but dangerous in the wrong hands.

[Miss Demeanour]

I wrap mine in cling film although the cutting is very erratic ( see also fresh bread)  

Answer is to live on your own .....no one else I can blame or who gives a toss  

[The Moan Ranger]

I wrap mine in cling film although the cutting is very erratic ( see also fresh bread)  

Answer is to live on your own .....no one else I can blame or who gives a toss  

 

[tel]

I never use clingfilm on cheese, makes it sweat.

Hence (Miss D should know this!)

[Uncle Mort]

 

You could always just grate it  

 

I trim the grated end of the cheese before putting back in the fridge as I don't like to leave it ragged.

[Miss Demeanour]

I never use clingfilm on cheese, makes it sweat.

Hence (Miss D should know this!)

Cling film, foil, bread wrapping whatever is available.

TBH - there is invariably little left to wrap 

[tel]

I never use clingfilm on cheese, makes it sweat.

Hence (Miss D should know this!)

Cling film, foil, bread wrapping whatever is available.

TBH - there is invariably little left to wrap 

I am not quite sure which way to read this.

Do you wrap yourself in bread?
And why so little?