...the Germans, French, Austrian and Czech's.
Was asked for my autograph after having had my photograph taken by some bloke, whose camera I then removed and confiscated for a couple of minutes after asking him did he actually know
who he was dealing with....David Beckhams first cousin, and close family friend of Michael Schumacher to be precise.
Camera handed back after spitting the word paparazzi at his face,and promises that picture would be deleted.
Poor lad looked terrified whilst his girl friends looked on in amazement, one of them asking for my autograph.
Much chortling ensued as we walked away.
Austrian that started talking to me was disgusted when I didn't know who he was talking about.
Some random british darts champion that's been world champion and thrown 3 consecutive 180's in a row apparently?
Phil Talylor was it?
He was absolutely shocked and totally astounded that I'd never heard of him. I calmly told him that darts isn't a sport but mearley a pub past time for overly fat drunken tossers.
He then started talking footie, and informed me he supported the mancs.
I informed him that I'm a Liverpool fan and bid him a fond farewell.
Taught one of my German friends mates a bit of scouse, and how to talk proper like
He is a big LFC fan, and every time he saw me, he'd break out into
'You'll Never walk Alone'When he got to the line, "with hope in your heart", I informed him that it's actually pronounced "with 'ope in yer'art or me'art"
After a great deal of Bitenburg and repeated mis-pronunciations of "ope in yer Gerrart, we moved on to the differences between me and yer.
I suggested a few more scoops might help, but the word 'scoops' then created more questions and much puzzlement and confuslication regarding the english language.
I considered discussing 'me 'ill' might have been pushing things a tad too far.
On the way back yesterday at the Dunkirk port, I was stopped by French customs, and asked to open up the back of me car.
First thing on sight was an open box of Asda cocktail sausages.
I quickly picked them up and with a cheery smile offered them around, much to their delight and amusement.
They were most happy and invited me to carry on without further a do.
With bulging sausage filled grinning mouths, I cheerily exclaimed just how easy it was to get 'round them.
Growler Top Tip. Take cocktail sausages to bribe customs.
Finally, and to prove a point that not ALL scousers are crooks, on the boat bog trap, I found a bulging wallet.
Opened it up and in it was a massive wad of dosh, a row of credit/debit cards and the poor sods passport.
Now I wouldn't want or expect any plaudits tbh, as I'd like to think that 90% of sheeples would do the same, and hand it in without hesitation.
It actually made me shudder to think that one of the other 10% that could so easily have found it would probably have simply emptied the contents and lobbed the empty wallet and passport overboard.
I assume the rightful owner of the apparent Czech national was reunited with his wallet from the information desk after his name was called out over the boats tannoy system.
Always here and happy to ensure full blossoment of international relations.
