Chompers

[Miss Demeanour]

I am sitting opposite some heifer ( yes I did check to ensure it wasn't a mirror  ) 

So far she has chewed her way through a Burger King breakfast , a packet of crisps and now a banana.

she is a chomper. Every mouthful is loudly churned and then gulped down loudly. Truly disgusterous

[Snoopy]

Change seats 

[Miss Demeanour]

Might be an option if it wasn't standing room only , due to the disruptions highlighted elsewhere

[Snoopy]

Then start a loud conversation with the Brat about diet, weight loss, looking good, etc etc.

Alternatively spend some money and travel first class ~ Cattle class isn't for decent people anyway.

Nicholas Winterton calls standard-class rail travellers a 'different type of person'

[Barman]

I am sitting opposite some heifer ( yes I did check to ensure it wasn't a mirror  ) 

So far she has chewed her way through a Burger King breakfast , a packet of crisps and now a banana.

she is a chomper. Every mouthful is loudly churned and then gulped down loudly. Truly disgusterous

Did she wash it all down with a diet cola...? 

[Uncle Mort]

very good BM 


I'd said something to her.   

[Pastis]

I'm developing a strong aversion to people eating on public transport (unless in the dining car, obviously) 

[Snoopy]

I dislike the popular habit of "grazing".

Eat at mealtimes, sat at a table with proper cutlery, napkins and condiments.

What's that? No time for breakfast ~ then fvcking well set your alarm twenty minutes earlier.

Lunch at my desk? ~ You must be out of your mind ... Lunch took at least 2 hours and was eaten in a restaurant/pub or bistro and nearly always followed by a stroll round the park. More money was earned for my employers over lunch than anywhere else. Now I am retired I still break for lunch. I hate eating over a keyboard.

Dinner .... when I get there, in the dining room, at the table with all the family sat. And yes I do say Grace.

[Darwins Selection]

I do say Grace.

In Latin I hope 

[Snoopy]

I do say Grace.

In Latin I hope 

Funnily enough .... yes (ish)

In nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti.

[Darwins Selection]

I do say Grace.

In Latin I hope 

Funnily enough .... yes (ish)

In nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti.

Benedic nos, Domine, et haec dona tua, quae sumus sumpturi de largitate tua, per Christum Dominum nostrum

[Uncle Mort]

The plate held a bed of over-cooked rice on top of which was the heated contents of a jar of Curry Sauce that contained a number of lumps. There was no obvious fish taste; in fact the lumps, which had the texture of old shoe leather and took as much chewing, later turned out to be some bits of coley that she had overcooked from frozen. When I asked what it all was she replied "Kedgeree".
We had a debate about what constitutes Kedgeree, Fish Curry and Shite.
My meal went in the bin. I made a cheese sandwich.

I can now see why you feel the need to pray before meals. 

[Miss Demeanour]

I dislike the popular habit of "grazing".

Eat at mealtimes, sat at a table with proper cutlery, napkins and condiments.

What's that? No time for breakfast ~ then fvcking well set your alarm twenty minutes earlier.

Lunch at my desk? ~ You must be out of your mind ... Lunch took at least 2 hours and was eaten in a restaurant/pub or bistro and nearly always followed by a stroll round the park. More money was earned for my employers over lunch than anywhere else. Now I am retired I still break for lunch. I hate eating over a keyboard.

Dinner .... when I get there, in the dining room, at the table with all the family sat. And yes I do say Grace.

I confess to many of the sins of which you speak 

However I am holding out on one hope that you would agree that take aways must preferably be eaten on a tray on your lap in front of the TV or your other choice of entertainment 

[Snoopy]

I dislike the popular habit of "grazing".

Eat at mealtimes, sat at a table with proper cutlery, napkins and condiments.

What's that? No time for breakfast ~ then fvcking well set your alarm twenty minutes earlier.

Lunch at my desk? ~ You must be out of your mind ... Lunch took at least 2 hours and was eaten in a restaurant/pub or bistro and nearly always followed by a stroll round the park. More money was earned for my employers over lunch than anywhere else. Now I am retired I still break for lunch. I hate eating over a keyboard.

Dinner .... when I get there, in the dining room, at the table with all the family sat. And yes I do say Grace.

I confess to many of the sins of which you speak 

However I am holding out on one hope that you would agree that take aways must preferably be eaten on a tray on your lap in front of the TV or your other choice of entertainment 

Never!

But then maybe not everyone has a dining room