Just how bad can a tradgedy be?

[Uncle Mort]

I agree, absolutely devastating for the families involved.

I have a serious question:

hypothetically, if say the teenagers, Kieran and Chloe turned out to have burnt down their local youth club the previous night how then would you feel about the tragedy?

Further to that, I think it is highly unlikely that would have been the case.

Have you noticed how all the ratty scumbags of society seem to lead 'charmed lives' and live to a ripe old age, yet the really decent ones that actually offer something to society tragically and far too often, get taken away far too prematurely.

Aye, only the good die young. 

[Snoopy]

I agree, absolutely devastating for the families involved.

I have a serious question:

hypothetically, if say the teenagers, Kieran and Chloe turned out to have burnt down their local youth club the previous night how then would you feel about the tragedy?

Further to that, I think it is highly unlikely that would have been the case.

Have you noticed how all the ratty scumbags of society seem to lead 'charmed lives' and live to a ripe old age, yet the really decent ones that actually offer something to society tragically and far too often, get taken away far too prematurely.

Aye, only the good die young. 

Most of us should live to a ripe old age then.

As for the original question ~ Too sad for words.

[Just One More]

My heart goes out to the families and all those who knew all three killed in this accident.

Yet another tragedy, life can be so cruel, we should all count our blessings

[Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons)]

My heart goes out to the families and all those who knew all three killed in this accident. As most of you know part of my duties include attend fatal or possible fatal RTI's. I've attended hundreds over the years and each one has a different story. Without doubt the ones that stick in the mind are those where children are involved, fortunately they do seem to be infrequent these days

Despite being hardened to these things, there are times when it gets to you. Twice I have had counselling, the first was to do with a particulalrly nasty accident scene, the second wasn't to do with the scene but to do with the circumstances surrounding it. A lady had had twins two weeks earlier, it was just before Christmas, she was suffering from post-natal depression and decided to throw herself in front of motorway traffic in the early hours. One husband deprived of his wife, two children deprived of their mother, a mother and father of their daughter, and many others affected too. At some point that poor man will have to tell his children what happened, how the hell do you begin to do that?

Yet another tragedy, life can be so cruel, we should all count our blessings

Agreed JOM was in the police force many years ago, saw and dealt with the results of a child going through a windscreen she had been sitting on her mothers lap. Mother and father both survived.  They were not bad people just did something stupid as we all so sometimes.  I can't begin to imagine what their life has been like since.

[Just One More]

And I haven't seen The Boy since February which is getting me down now.

Nick, as others have said... sort it

I rarely talk on here about my girls. My ex and I had a really messy divorce many moons ago now. Everytime I went from Hampshire to Shropshire/Cheshire/Manchester/Liverpool to see them I was either rung beforehand or met at the door with a new excuse each time, "they're ill", "they don't won't to see you", "they're at their grans/aunties" etc etc. Four and a bit years of that crap, not seeing them despite solicitors being involved. It hurt a bloody lot then and it still hurts now. It came to a head when my eldest by then 14 years old knocked on my door in tears, my little girl last seen when 9 was then a blossoming young lady of 14, I'd missed those years for all three girls, I'll never get them back. Don't let it happen to you

[Pastis]

I always find it difficult to contribute to a thread such as this; one or two of you may understand why already. Whenever I hear or read of children dying in an accident or worse an intentional killing (remember the Beslan massacre?) it chills me to the bone. I feel for the parents enormously and also the siblings that are left behind that have to somehow cope with the awful bereavement.

As to understanding how the families will manage; it will be sheer, utter, inexplicable bloody hell. When my elder brother died along with three of his school chums it nearly destroyed four families - eight parents and five siblings. There was little concept of counselling then, just Valium or whatever it was called which I think my mother was on for around a couple of years. The siblings including myself were traumatised for life; it's not something you get over but rather have to learn to live with as competently as you are able.
Quick and immediate action in the form of care and counselling will, I believe go some way to ameliorate the deep emotional and psychological wounds that will inevitably leave scars. It's awful, there's no other word for it and I can only hope that they receive as much support as possible.

[Miss Demeanour]

Seems like there is an awful lot of us here that are aware of the pain and the impact this can have on people you love. Don't give up on your boy Nick  - ever.

Speaking as someone that did not really know too much about their own dad ( mum left him when I was 3) I found out an awful lot more information in my later years about exactly how much effort he had been too to try and keep in contact. For whatever reasons my mum had she just tried to blank him out of our lives.

I met him again when I was 18 and I completely didn't know how to handle the situation . There was a man in front of me that obviously still loved me and I felt nothing and numb and completely ill equipped to deal with the situation.

He died a few years later and he left me a legacy of letters he had written to me over the years . One of the most heart breaking days of my life so far was reading those and wishing I had had another chance.

I know the Boy is a little older but he needs to know you are still there and fighting his corner

xxx

[Nick]

I am werking on it and HOPE to be taking him out for the day on SUnday 

[barmisspah?]

Fingers crossed for you Nick

[Nick]

Thanks Ms B and all others. A new and further possibility has just arisen

[Snoopy]

Have him for the whole of half term?

[Barman]

Thanks Ms B and all others. A new and further possibility has just arisen

Ship him to Cyprus...? 

[GROWLER]

It shouldn't be HOPE. It should be a right, YOUR RIGHT!

All bang out of order this, basically using kids as pawns. Makes my bloody bladder boil beyond belief.

[Snoopy]

Indeed but it happens all the time. Hell hath no fury like, in this case, a Mrs Nick who thinks she has been scorned. Any weapon will do but the best weapon will be the one she knows will hurt the most and that is what she is using.
Nick is well able to go round there, break down the door and carry the child off and then spend the next few weeks dodging the cops until he is arrested, banged up and forever barred from seeing the child.

That is the reality of how the system works.

Impossible for him to do anything other than try the legal route and hope.

Or I suppose he could dress up as Superman and sit atop the Liver Building with a banner calling for Rights for Fathers and then get arrested, banged up and be forever marked down as a nutter who could not be trusted and thus not allowed near the Boy.

Yes mate it boils my piss too but that's the way it is. Life is often shit!

[GROWLER]

Indeed but it happens all the time. Hell hath no fury like, in this case, a Mrs Nick who thinks she has been scorned. Any weapon will do but the best weapon will be the one she knows will hurt the most and that is what she is using.
Nick is well able to go round there, break down the door and carry the child off and then spend the next few weeks dodging the cops until he is arrested, banged up and forever barred from seeing the child.

That is the reality of how the system works.

Impossible for him to do anything other than try the legal route and hope.

Or I suppose he could dress up as Superman and sit atop the Liver Building with a banner calling for Rights for Fathers and then get arrested, banged up and be forever marked down as a nutter who could not be trusted and thus not allowed near the Boy.

Yes mate it boils my piss too but that's the way it is. Life is often shit!

I know, I know I know. That's what's so frustrating, and the laws need changing...... fast.

P'raps this new administration will finally look at this serious problem, and actually do something about this intolerable situation.

As you rightly say, many wimmin do all this just to spite the father, without a second thought for the damage they are doing to the child/ren. Downright bloody evil.
I had some of this shite when I split up from Mrs G#1 back in '78, but only to the extent that I was given strict times for pick up and return, and initially from the bottom of the road.
Made to feel like some sort of  friggin' criminal.