Strange and useless things.

[GROWLER]

Look at this way you Philistines 

If you were running a restaurant and determined to cut costs one of the areas you'd be looking at would be wastage. Discarding 10% of the lettuce because it's brown is waste; to reduce that waste is to increase profit .... ok? 

Look you raging lettuce leaf, if I was running a restaurant, the menu would consist of Fray Bentos pies, chips, beans, toast, chips, full English all day and night brekky's and chips. Cake for pudding, chocolate and marzipan.

Lettuce would be only used in the bogs to wipe bottoms on.

[Barman]

Look at this way you Philistines 

If you were running a restaurant and determined to cut costs one of the areas you'd be looking at would be wastage. Discarding 10% of the lettuce because it's brown is waste; to reduce that waste is to increase profit .... ok? 

Look you raging lettuce leaf, if I was running a restaurant, the menu would consist of Fray Bentos pies, chips, beans, toast, chips, full English all day and night brekky's and chips. Cake for pudding, chocolate and marzipan.

Lettuce would be only used in the bogs to wipe bottoms on.

Wot he said! ^^^^

Apart from Tarzipan obviously.... 

[Pastis]

Look at this way you Philistines 

If you were running a restaurant and determined to cut costs one of the areas you'd be looking at would be wastage. Discarding 10% of the lettuce because it's brown is waste; to reduce that waste is to increase profit .... ok? 

Look you raging lettuce leaf, if I was running a restaurant, the menu would consist of Fray Bentos pies, chips, beans, toast, chips, full English all day and night brekky's and chips. Cake for pudding, chocolate and marzipan.

Lettuce would be only used in the bogs to wipe bottoms on.

I have never, ever been called a raging lettuce leaf    Hat off to Growler for the insult of the week! 

As for opening a restaurant; the thought had occurred to me on several occasions 

[GROWLER]

Haute Quisine  salad dishes no doubt, using your lettuce cutter naturally?

[Barman]

Napkin: tucked in the collar or on the lap like...?

[Miss Demeanour]

I'm surprised Tipsy isn't in salivating over Pastis's suggestions  

[Barman]

I'm surprised Tipsy isn't in salivating over Pastis's suggestions  

Perhaps she is bizzy like...? 

[GROWLER]

I'm surprised Tipsy isn't in salivating over Pastis's suggestions  

Perhaps she is bizzy like...? 

Suprised you're still in here tbh BM.
Haven't one of your mates insisted on taking you down the local taverna for a birthday bevvy at least?

[Barman]

I'm surprised Tipsy isn't in salivating over Pastis's suggestions  

Perhaps she is bizzy like...? 

Suprised you're still in here tbh BM.
Haven't one of your mates insisted on taking you down the local taverna for a birthday bevvy at least?

No... 

[Pastis]

Haute Quisine  salad dishes no doubt, using your lettuce cutter naturally?

#1. Have disproved the need for a lettuce knife QED 

#2. Napkins: do as you please and dependent on where you are. Italians favour the neck approach 

#3. I'm sure Tipsy's Francophile leanings are strictly family 

And #4. Yes BM, if this were my birthday I wouldn't be able to construct a sentence let alone type it 

[Darwins Selection]

. .  if this were my birthday I wouldn't be able to construct a sentence let alone type it 

Happy birthday Pastis. 

[Pastis]

. .  if this were my birthday I wouldn't be able to construct a sentence let alone type it 

Happy birthday Pastis. 

        

[Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons)]

How much time do you have on your hands   

I just have curiosity in the kitchen, honest 

Well let her go for heavens sake you will have the police after you.

[Tipsy Gipsy]

I'm surprised Tipsy isn't in salivating over Pastis's suggestions  

I was busy eating lettuce in Hampshire. 

[Barman]

Oooohhhh my poor head...