Fresh from the Inbox

[Barman]

My poor grandmother has had Alzheimer's for several years now; I guess I should be grateful for the £5 I get for my birthday every week.

 

[Steve]

My poor grandmother has had Alzheimer's for several years now; I guess I should be grateful for the £5 I get for my birthday every week.

 

 

[apc2010]

My poor grandmother has had Alzheimer's for several years now; I guess I should be grateful for the £5 I get for my birthday every week.

 

[Steve]

FIFTY SHADES OF GREY BY PAM AYRES

The missus bought a Paperback,
down Shepton Mallet way,
I had a look inside her bag;...
T'was "Fifty Shades of Grey".

Well I just left her to it,
And at ten I went to bed.
An hour later she appeared;
The sight filled me with dread.

In her left hand she held a rope;
And in her right a whip!
She threw them down upon the floor,
And then began to strip.

Well fifty years or so ago;
I might have had a peek;
But Mabel hasn't weathered well;
She's eighty four next week!!

Watching Mabel bump and grind;
Could not have been much grimmer.
And things then went from bad to worse;
She toppled off her Zimmer!

She struggled back upon her feet;
A couple minutes later;
She put her teeth back in and said
"I am a dominator!!"

Now if you knew our Mabel,
You'd see just why I spluttered,
I'd spent two months in traction
For the last complaint I'd uttered.

She stood there nude and naked
Bent forward just a bit
I went to hold her, sensual like
and stood on her left tit!

Mabel screamed, her teeth shot out;
My God what had I done!
She moaned and groaned then shouted out:
"Step on the other one!!"

Well readers, I can tell no more;
Of what occurred that day.
Suffice to say my blackish hair,
Turned fifty shades of grey!!

[Baldy]

 

[apc2010]

Three east London schoolgirls have flown to Turkey and there are fears they may cross the Syrian border and join the Islamic State terrorists.............





The original request was for 72, but that's east London for you............

[Barman]

Three east London schoolgirls have flown to Turkey and there are fears they may cross the Syrian border and join the Islamic State terrorists.............





The original request was for 72, but that's east London for you............

[Baldy]

Three east London schoolgirls have flown to Turkey and there are fears they may cross the Syrian border and join the Islamic State terrorists.............





The original request was for 72, but that's east London for you............

 

[Darwins Selection]

Three east London schoolgirls have flown to Turkey and there are fears they may cross the Syrian border and join the Islamic State terrorists.............





The original request was for 72, but that's east London for you............

 

[Uncle Mort]

A man walks into a book shop in Tower Hamlets and asks if they have a
book on UKIP policies.

The shopkeeper says,
“Fuck off,  get out and don’t come back”

The man says,
“Yes, that’s the one"

[Barman]

A man walks into a book shop in Tower Hamlets and asks if they have a
book on UKIP policies.

The shopkeeper says,
“Fuck off,  get out and don’t come back”

The man says,
“Yes, that’s the one"

[apc2010]

A man walks into a book shop in Tower Hamlets and asks if they have a
book on UKIP policies.

The shopkeeper says,
“Fuck off,  get out and don’t come back”

The man says,
“Yes, that’s the one"

 

[Baldy]

A man walks into a book shop in Tower Hamlets and asks if they have a
book on UKIP policies.

The shopkeeper says,
“Fuck off,  get out and don’t come back”

The man says,
“Yes, that’s the one"

 

 

[Steve]

A man walks into a book shop in Tower Hamlets and asks if they have a
book on UKIP policies.

The shopkeeper says,
“Fuck off,  get out and don’t come back”

The man says,
“Yes, that’s the one"

 

 

[Darwins Selection]

A man walks into a book shop in Tower Hamlets and asks if they have a
book on UKIP policies.

The shopkeeper says,
“Fuck off,  get out and don’t come back”

The man says,
“Yes, that’s the one"