Fresh from the Inbox

[Steve]

 

[Steve]

So far today, I've done all right...   I haven't lost my temper, and I haven't been grumpy, nasty, selfish, or wishing to throttle someone, knowing there are more idiots who believe the more they know, the more I realise they know nothing.

I'm very thankful for that. But in a few minutes, I'm going to get out of bed.....
and from then on, I'm going to need a lot of help.

[Barman]

So far today, I've done all right...   I haven't lost my temper, and I haven't been grumpy, nasty, selfish, or wishing to throttle someone, knowing there are more idiots who believe the more they know, the more I realise they know nothing.

I'm very thankful for that. But in a few minutes, I'm going to get out of bed.....
and from then on, I'm going to need a lot of help.

 

[Just One More]

So far today, I've done all right...   I haven't lost my temper, and I haven't been grumpy, nasty, selfish, or wishing to throttle someone, knowing there are more idiots who believe the more they know, the more I realise they know nothing.

I'm very thankful for that. But in a few minutes, I'm going to get out of bed.....
and from then on, I'm going to need a lot of help.

 

   

[Steve]

A newly married couple is in bed when the man asks his wife how many men she has slept with.
After the question, the woman doesn’t respond.
The man asks again “Just tell me, it’s fine. How many men have you slept with?” His wife, still in total silence, just stares at the ceiling.
The man says “I am sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you. I just thought we could trust each other…”
Still silence from his wife.
The man, giving up, says “It’s OK. Please don’t be upset.”
Since the woman is still silent, the man starts hugging and kissing her, showing his affection.
While he is doing this, his wife seems to come to her senses, stops looking at the ceiling, looks at him, and upset, tells her husband,
“Damn it! You made me lose count!”

[Barman]

A newly married couple is in bed when the man asks his wife how many men she has slept with.
After the question, the woman doesn’t respond.
The man asks again “Just tell me, it’s fine. How many men have you slept with?” His wife, still in total silence, just stares at the ceiling.
The man says “I am sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you. I just thought we could trust each other…”
Still silence from his wife.
The man, giving up, says “It’s OK. Please don’t be upset.”
Since the woman is still silent, the man starts hugging and kissing her, showing his affection.
While he is doing this, his wife seems to come to her senses, stops looking at the ceiling, looks at him, and upset, tells her husband,
“Damn it! You made me lose count!”

 

[Just One More]

A newly married couple is in bed when the man asks his wife how many men she has slept with.
After the question, the woman doesn’t respond.
The man asks again “Just tell me, it’s fine. How many men have you slept with?” His wife, still in total silence, just stares at the ceiling.
The man says “I am sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you. I just thought we could trust each other…”
Still silence from his wife.
The man, giving up, says “It’s OK. Please don’t be upset.”
Since the woman is still silent, the man starts hugging and kissing her, showing his affection.
While he is doing this, his wife seems to come to her senses, stops looking at the ceiling, looks at him, and upset, tells her husband,
“Damn it! You made me lose count!”

 

 

[Steve]

A brand-new bar opens opposite a Church of all the places!
The Church Prayed Daily against the bar business.
Days later the bar was struck by lightning and caught fire which destroyed it.
The bar Owner Sued the Church Authorities for the cause of its destruction, as it was an action because of their Prayer.
The Church Denied all Responsibility!!!
So, the judge commented,
“It’s Difficult to Decide the Case because here we have a Bar Owner Who Believes in the Power of Prayer…
…and an Entire Church that Doesn’t Believe in it”

[Barman]

A brand-new bar opens opposite a Church of all the places!
The Church Prayed Daily against the bar business.
Days later the bar was struck by lightning and caught fire which destroyed it.
The bar Owner Sued the Church Authorities for the cause of its destruction, as it was an action because of their Prayer.
The Church Denied all Responsibility!!!
So, the judge commented,
“It’s Difficult to Decide the Case because here we have a Bar Owner Who Believes in the Power of Prayer…
…and an Entire Church that Doesn’t Believe in it”

  

[Just One More]

A brand-new bar opens opposite a Church of all the places!
The Church Prayed Daily against the bar business.
Days later the bar was struck by lightning and caught fire which destroyed it.
The bar Owner Sued the Church Authorities for the cause of its destruction, as it was an action because of their Prayer.
The Church Denied all Responsibility!!!
So, the judge commented,
“It’s Difficult to Decide the Case because here we have a Bar Owner Who Believes in the Power of Prayer…
…and an Entire Church that Doesn’t Believe in it”

  

 

[apc2010]

My friend Dave the fireman was in a burning building the other day when he came across a trapped sexy busty 20-year-old blonde...........


He said “you’re the 4th pregnant woman I’ve rescued this year”.....


She said “I’m not pregnant”...........?



Dave said, “yeah, and you’re not rescued yet either”........................

[Barman]

My friend Dave the fireman was in a burning building the other day when he came across a trapped sexy busty 20-year-old blonde...........


He said “you’re the 4th pregnant woman I’ve rescued this year”.....


She said “I’m not pregnant”...........?



Dave said, “yeah, and you’re not rescued yet either”........................

 

[Grumpmeister]

[Barman]

 

[Steve]