Author Topic: Fresh from the Inbox  (Read 793233 times)

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Offline Baldy

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #1845 on: January 09, 2013, 12:07:40 PM »
Jump in and I'll take you home I said to my dwarf neighbour who was sat at the bus stop today ......
Fuck off he replied! ...
Suit yourself then, I said as I straightened up my backpack and continued my walk....

 lol: lol: lol:

Offline Just One More

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #1846 on: January 10, 2013, 07:22:13 PM »
A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in their bed. She puts on her dressing gown and goes down stairs to look for him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in front him. He appears deep in thought, just staring at the wall. She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of coffee.
"What's the matter, dear?" she whispers as she steps into the room. "Why are you down here at this time of night?"
The husband looks up, "Do you remember 20 years ago when we were dating, and you were only 17?" ... he asks solemnly. The wife is touched thinking her husband is so caring and sensitive. "Yes, I do," she replies.
The husband pauses. The words are not coming easily.
"Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car?"
"Yes, I remember," says the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him.
The husband continues..."Do you remember when he shoved a shotgun in my face and said, "Either you marry my daughter, or I will send you to jail for 20 years".
"I remember that too", she replies softly.
He wipes another tear from his cheek and says... "I would have got out today!"
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Online Barman

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #1847 on: January 10, 2013, 07:26:54 PM »
A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in their bed. She puts on her dressing gown and goes down stairs to look for him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in front him. He appears deep in thought, just staring at the wall. She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of coffee.
"What's the matter, dear?" she whispers as she steps into the room. "Why are you down here at this time of night?"
The husband looks up, "Do you remember 20 years ago when we were dating, and you were only 17?" ... he asks solemnly. The wife is touched thinking her husband is so caring and sensitive. "Yes, I do," she replies.
The husband pauses. The words are not coming easily.
"Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car?"
"Yes, I remember," says the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him.
The husband continues..."Do you remember when he shoved a shotgun in my face and said, "Either you marry my daughter, or I will send you to jail for 20 years".
"I remember that too", she replies softly.
He wipes another tear from his cheek and says... "I would have got out today!"

AFFS!  ::)
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Offline Miss Demeanour

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #1848 on: January 12, 2013, 09:20:15 AM »
Will it never end. It has been reported that BBC's Andrew Marr had a stroke. No news yet as to how old the victim is.
Skubber

Offline Just One More

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #1849 on: January 12, 2013, 09:22:04 AM »
 lol:
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline apc2010

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #1850 on: January 13, 2013, 07:53:31 PM »
Another bus gangrape in India.

I don't know, you wait ages for one... redface:

Offline Baldy

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #1851 on: January 13, 2013, 08:07:18 PM »
Another bus gangrape in India.

I don't know, you wait ages for one... redface:

 noooo: noooo: lol: lol: lol:

Online Barman

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #1852 on: January 13, 2013, 08:10:50 PM »
Another bus gangrape in India.

I don't know, you wait ages for one... redface:

happy001
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Offline Miss Demeanour

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #1853 on: January 14, 2013, 06:25:12 AM »
My mate's going on Embarrassing Bodies tomorrow. He's got a huge Aston Villa tattoo on his back
Skubber

Offline Miss Demeanour

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #1854 on: January 14, 2013, 06:25:36 AM »
Two chavs were having a pint when they started arguing. One said, "Do you want to take this inside, mate?"
Skubber

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #1855 on: January 14, 2013, 06:39:27 AM »
 lol: lol: lol:
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Offline Just One More

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #1856 on: January 14, 2013, 06:43:34 AM »
 lol:  lol:  lol:  lol:  (to both)
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline apc2010

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #1857 on: January 14, 2013, 10:43:18 PM »

'BBC out of touch with the young generation'.








It's probably for the best that they don't go back there....... redface:

Offline Baldy

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #1858 on: January 14, 2013, 11:03:13 PM »

'BBC out of touch with the young generation'.








It's probably for the best that they don't go back there....... redface:

 lol: lol: lol:

Online Barman

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #1859 on: January 15, 2013, 06:55:26 AM »

'BBC out of touch with the young generation'.








It's probably for the best that they don't go back there....... redface:

 lol: lol: lol:

 lol: lol: lol: lol:
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