Fresh from the Inbox

[Just One More]

These so-called 'Gender-reassignment process surgeries' are a scam. As I don't get the attention I feel I deserve, I thought I might try identifying as something different.
I was expecting the clinic to be like a Chinese takeaway with all the genders you can choose from now, but NO! I was told they only do 2!
"Are you trying to say there are only two?" I demanded, but the doctor just replied, "I'm not saying fuck all, mate. Now do you wanna be a bird or not?"
Needlless to say, I stormed off in a huff and haven't spoken to them since, so maybe it's pretty clear what gender I actually am, after all.

 

[Barman]

These so-called 'Gender-reassignment process surgeries' are a scam. As I don't get the attention I feel I deserve, I thought I might try identifying as something different.
I was expecting the clinic to be like a Chinese takeaway with all the genders you can choose from now, but NO! I was told they only do 2!
"Are you trying to say there are only two?" I demanded, but the doctor just replied, "I'm not saying fuck all, mate. Now do you wanna be a bird or not?"
Needlless to say, I stormed off in a huff and haven't spoken to them since, so maybe it's pretty clear what gender I actually am, after all.

 

 

[Just One More]

Fucking wankers letting fireworks off in October

The dog's bolted and knocked the Christmas tree over

[apc2010]

Fucking wankers letting fireworks off in October

The dog's bolted and knocked the Christmas tree over

 

[Steve]

Fucking wankers letting fireworks off in October

The dog's bolted and knocked the Christmas tree over

 

[apc2010]

What is the difference between jam and marmalade............
















You can't marmalade your cock up your girlfriends ass.........

[Barman]

Fucking wankers letting fireworks off in October

The dog's bolted and knocked the Christmas tree over

 

We have a Xmas tree... 

[Barman]

What is the difference between jam and marmalade............
















You can't marmalade your cock up your girlfriends ass.........

 

[Just One More]

What is the difference between jam and marmalade............
















You can't marmalade your cock up your girlfriends ass.........

 

 

[Steve]

When I was 13, I hoped that one day I would have a beautiful girlfriend with big tits. When I was 16, I got a girlfriend with big tits, but there was no passion, so I decided I needed a passionate girl with zest for life.
In college I dated a passionate girl, but she was too emotional. Everything was an emergency; she was a drama queen, cried all the time and threatened suicide. So I decided I needed a girl with stability.
When I was 25, I found a very stable girl but she was boring. She was totally predictable and never got excited about anything. Life became so dull that I decided I needed a girl with some excitement.
When I was 28, I found an exciting girl, but I couldn't keep up with her. She rushed from one thing to another, never settling on anything. She did mad impetuous things and made me miserable as often as happy. She was great fun initially and very energetic, but directionless. So I decided to find a girl with some real ambition.
When I turned 30, I found a smart ambitious girl with her feet planted firmly on the ground, so I married her. She was so ambitious that she divorced me and took everything I owned.
I am older and wiser now, and I am looking for a beautiful girlfriend with big tits.

[Barman]

When I was 13, I hoped that one day I would have a beautiful girlfriend with big tits. When I was 16, I got a girlfriend with big tits, but there was no passion, so I decided I needed a passionate girl with zest for life.
In college I dated a passionate girl, but she was too emotional. Everything was an emergency; she was a drama queen, cried all the time and threatened suicide. So I decided I needed a girl with stability.
When I was 25, I found a very stable girl but she was boring. She was totally predictable and never got excited about anything. Life became so dull that I decided I needed a girl with some excitement.
When I was 28, I found an exciting girl, but I couldn't keep up with her. She rushed from one thing to another, never settling on anything. She did mad impetuous things and made me miserable as often as happy. She was great fun initially and very energetic, but directionless. So I decided to find a girl with some real ambition.
When I turned 30, I found a smart ambitious girl with her feet planted firmly on the ground, so I married her. She was so ambitious that she divorced me and took everything I owned.
I am older and wiser now, and I am looking for a beautiful girlfriend with big tits.

 

[apc2010]

 

[Barman]

 

[Steve]

My wife called me as I was sat in the pub last night.
"I've cooked dinner," she screamed, "And if you're not home within 20 minutes I'm going to feed it to the dog."
"Woooah! That's bang out of order!" I said, "It's not his fault."

[Barman]

My wife called me as I was sat in the pub last night.
"I've cooked dinner," she screamed, "And if you're not home within 20 minutes I'm going to feed it to the dog."
"Woooah! That's bang out of order!" I said, "It's not his fault."