Fresh from the Inbox

[Barman]

I've just been watching Rachel Riliey on Countdown and got aroused.

Not bad, seven letters... 

[Steve]

I've just been watching Rachel Riliey on Countdown and got aroused.

Not bad, seven letters... 

[apc2010]

I've just been watching Rachel Riliey on Countdown and got aroused.

Not bad, seven letters... 

 

[Steve]

A fat man saw an ad:
"lose 5kg in a week" in a newspaper.
He calls the company & lady says to be ready tomorrow at 6 am.
The next morning he opens the door & finds a hot babe with just shoes, undergarments & shirt saying:
"you catch me I'm yours" & the girl starts running.
He starts running but doesn't catch her. During the whole week, he tried to catch her but couldn't.
However, he loses 5 kg.
He then asks for the 10kg program.
The next morning at 6 he opens the door and sees an even hotter babe in shoes, G string & a shirt saying:
"you catch me I'm yours"!
He loses 10 kg that week.
So he thought this program is awesome!
Let's try the 25 kg!
So he asked for the 25 kg but the lady said "R u sure? it's really tough".
He said "YES!"
The next day at 6 he opens the door, he finds a gay in just underwear saying, "If I catch you, Your mine!!!

[Barman]

A fat man saw an ad:
"lose 5kg in a week" in a newspaper.
He calls the company & lady says to be ready tomorrow at 6 am.
The next morning he opens the door & finds a hot babe with just shoes, undergarments & shirt saying:
"you catch me I'm yours" & the girl starts running.
He starts running but doesn't catch her. During the whole week, he tried to catch her but couldn't.
However, he loses 5 kg.
He then asks for the 10kg program.
The next morning at 6 he opens the door and sees an even hotter babe in shoes, G string & a shirt saying:
"you catch me I'm yours"!
He loses 10 kg that week.
So he thought this program is awesome!
Let's try the 25 kg!
So he asked for the 25 kg but the lady said "R u sure? it's really tough".
He said "YES!"
The next day at 6 he opens the door, he finds a gay in just underwear saying, "If I catch you, Your mine!!!

  an oldie but goldie!

[Steve]

Yes I thought it screamed Affs but search engine said no

[Barman]

Yes I thought it screamed Affs but search engine said no

I think it predates the search engine! 

[Steve]

Yes I thought it screamed Affs but search engine said no

I think it predates the search engine! 

and maybe the internet too

[Uncle Mort]

Sylvester Stallone says he wants to make a movie about classical music.

He says, “I'll be Beethoven.”

Jean Claude Van Damme says, “I’ll be Mozart.”

Arnold Schwarzenegger said, “C’mon guys, don’t make me…”

[Steve]

Sylvester Stallone says he wants to make a movie about classical music.

He says, “I'll be Beethoven.”

Jean Claude Van Damme says, “I’ll be Mozart.”

Arnold Schwarzenegger said, “C’mon guys, don’t make me…”

[Barman]

Sylvester Stallone says he wants to make a movie about classical music.

He says, “I'll be Beethoven.”

Jean Claude Van Damme says, “I’ll be Mozart.”

Arnold Schwarzenegger said, “C’mon guys, don’t make me…”

 

[Steve]

Just asked the woman in Waterstones if Prince Harry’s book is available to download. She said ‘do you want the PDF file?’ I said no, that’s his uncle.

[Barman]

Just asked the woman in Waterstones if Prince Harry’s book is available to download. She said ‘do you want the PDF file?’ I said no, that’s his uncle.

[apc2010]

Just asked the woman in Waterstones if Prince Harry’s book is available to download. She said ‘do you want the PDF file?’ I said no, that’s his uncle.

 

[Barman]

Ukraine surprised to discover Satnav on German tanks set to Paris