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Author Topic: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread  (Read 247643 times)

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Online Barman

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #330 on: August 25, 2011, 04:51:32 AM »
Following yesterday's "incident", the Team Leader was giving a severe bollocking and that's all. Result.

Bingo!  :thumbsup:

And the H&S Nazi's car was blocked in by a 747 tug....?  whistle:
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Offline The Moan Ranger

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #331 on: August 30, 2011, 02:41:15 AM »
First night back and a good busy night, I stayed on an extra 1/2 hour to do the delayed Dalaman flight.

Highlight of the night was Malaga flight - I picked up a bag belonging to a "Beartice H****y" and it was vibrating...we chose not to examine the contents!

The journey home takes 26 minutes - 27 if I hit two sets of red lights. I know every pothole, the fastest line through any corners and where I can use gravity as opposed to petrol. I set off the same speed warning signs every night and I see the same foxes every night.

When I get back home, it's always a bugger trying to find somewhere to park and I normally end up about 300 yards down the road. Since my little incident with the unwanted intruders, I am a bit jumpy and I don't like the 300 yard walk back home. Tonight, however, there were two police cars and a van parked halfway between where I parked and home - the police eyed me suspiciously as I crawled past in the car, looking for a spot. So I eventually found a space and started walking back - genuinely glad that they were there. As I was approaching them they were still eyeing me - can't blame them, shaved head, wearing shorts at this time of the morning. I said to them "Nice to see you". One then blocked my path and asked "Where have you been this evening?". So I told them - Gatwick, just finished work. "What do you mean, "nice to see you?" So I explained about the intruders and my jumpiness when walking along the road in the early hours. "Oh, we know all about your case - one of the worst attacks round here for ages, are you alright? You should take up the Counselling they offer, we're desperate to get this gang, they've done two more since you."

What a nice bunch of plod!

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #332 on: August 30, 2011, 04:20:53 AM »
First night back and a good busy night, I stayed on an extra 1/2 hour to do the delayed Dalaman flight.

Highlight of the night was Malaga flight - I picked up a bag belonging to a "Beartice H****y" and it was vibrating...we chose not to examine the contents!

The journey home takes 26 minutes - 27 if I hit two sets of red lights. I know every pothole, the fastest line through any corners and where I can use gravity as opposed to petrol. I set off the same speed warning signs every night and I see the same foxes every night.

When I get back home, it's always a bugger trying to find somewhere to park and I normally end up about 300 yards down the road. Since my little incident with the unwanted intruders, I am a bit jumpy and I don't like the 300 yard walk back home. Tonight, however, there were two police cars and a van parked halfway between where I parked and home - the police eyed me suspiciously as I crawled past in the car, looking for a spot. So I eventually found a space and started walking back - genuinely glad that they were there. As I was approaching them they were still eyeing me - can't blame them, shaved head, wearing shorts at this time of the morning. I said to them "Nice to see you". One then blocked my path and asked "Where have you been this evening?". So I told them - Gatwick, just finished work. "What do you mean, "nice to see you?" So I explained about the intruders and my jumpiness when walking along the road in the early hours. "Oh, we know all about your case - one of the worst attacks round here for ages, are you alright? You should take up the Counselling they offer, we're desperate to get this gang, they've done two more since you."

What a nice bunch of plod!

Why were they there tho...?  rubschin:
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Offline The Moan Ranger

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #333 on: August 30, 2011, 10:36:01 AM »
There's a small block of flats there - I think it's a sort of halfway house thing - and there are some "strange" people in there. Hence my jumpiness walking along the road.

Offline tel

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #334 on: August 30, 2011, 10:38:34 AM »
Some of them are a bit more than strange!

     RTFM

Offline Snoopy

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #335 on: August 30, 2011, 10:39:26 AM »
"Half-way House" or a "Probation Hostel"  rubschin:
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #336 on: August 30, 2011, 10:39:52 AM »
Some of them are a bit more than strange!

TMR you mean...?  rubschin:
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Offline The Moan Ranger

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #337 on: August 30, 2011, 11:06:22 AM »
I think Snoopy has the measure of it, although there is definitely one odd one - the Manic Street Preacher - "AND GOD IS YOUR REDEMPTION, THROUGH HIS LOVE YOU WILL ATTAIN ETERNAL PEACE.." He got the hump when I asked him how he felt about the "act of god" that was the Tsunami...

Offline The Moan Ranger

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #338 on: September 10, 2011, 01:09:10 AM »
Last flight of the night was Antalya. 185 feckin bags/golf clubs etc.  We had the electric lorry stacked so high that the top ones scraped the roof as we went into the North baggage tip.

Bastard passengers!

Offline Uncle Mort

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #339 on: September 10, 2011, 07:18:50 AM »
Bastard passengers!

I've heard they're termed "SLC" (Self Loading Cargo)

Offline GROWLER

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #340 on: September 10, 2011, 07:24:37 AM »

What a nice bunch of plod!

 eeek:
I need a  eastdrink048...quick like.

Offline The Moan Ranger

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #341 on: September 15, 2011, 02:44:35 AM »
The electric lorries we drive weigh 6 1/2 tons. Hefty.

The front cowl of a CFM-56 engine as used on an Airbus A319 is surprisingly fragile.

Unfortunately one of my colleagues decided to splice the two this evening. There was only ever going to be one winner and it wasn't the engine.

Not good.

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #342 on: September 15, 2011, 04:17:36 AM »
The electric lorries we drive weigh 6 1/2 tons. Hefty.

The front cowl of a CFM-56 engine as used on an Airbus A319 is surprisingly fragile.

Unfortunately one of my colleagues decided to splice the two this evening. There was only ever going to be one winner and it wasn't the engine.

Not good.

Not cheap....  noooo:
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Offline The Moan Ranger

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #343 on: September 15, 2011, 03:03:57 PM »
Expensive for him - he resigned this morning.

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #344 on: September 15, 2011, 06:15:52 PM »
Expensive for him - he resigned this morning.

Shit!
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