TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread

[Barman]

We dont use the guns any more - they cost too much munny (6p per bag scanned).

We use "bingo cards" instead

But BM is right - poor "walk-around".

Bingo cards  .......

The winner gets his luggage delivered to the right country.....

[boogs]

We dont use the guns any more - they cost too much munny (6p per bag scanned).

We use "bingo cards" instead

But BM is right - poor "walk-around".

Bingo cards  .......

The winner gets his luggage delivered to the right country.....

 

[Darwins Selection]

We dont use the guns any more - they cost too much munny (6p per bag scanned).

We use "bingo cards" instead

But BM is right - poor "walk-around".

Bingo cards  .......

The winner gets his luggage delivered to the right country.....

 

[Marley's Ghost (Imbiber of Spirits)]

"The baggage handler had been using the metal gun earlier this month to ensure the correct bags were loaded.
He left it on the engine’s cowling and forgot to pick it up again."

That's a bit worrying.  Just how long was this 'plane lumbering round with his "gun" sitting in the intake?

And, since it was a gun, WTF were security doing?

[The Moan Ranger]

Right. This new "summer" roster that's in place for 18 weeks. First off, it's total wank. There are 15 different start/finish times so your sleep pattern is going to get utterly confuddled before too long.

Then - and this is the killer for me - we are now in static teams of 3. Previously you worked with different people every day. The team I have been lumbered with is Brian "Dangerous" D and a noobie called Brian S, who I think is 194 years old. Dangerous Brian is the Team Leader by dint of the fact he can push planes out in the tug (I'm on a course next month to do this). He's okay though. The noobie, however, can do very little. And what he can do, he does very slowly.

We were given 2 Turkish Airlines jobs today - one after the other - and these are hard, hard jobs. Most of the bags are in the 30kg mark and there are usually about 180 of them, plus 1 tonne of cargo. All in A321's, which are fairly long planes, with holds like bowling alleys. I threw all the bags/cargo out of the inbound and the two Brians stacked them on the lorry. For the outbound, old Brian S simply couldn't throw the bags far enough so I plonked myself at the top of the loading belt and threw the bags and cargo down the hold to him to stack them. I must have hit him 10 times with various bags  After about 7 minutes, he simply couldn't carry on, so I kicked him out of the hold and did it myself. Must admit I was sweating somewhat.

After those, we were given our first canteen break (we'd been out for 5 1/2 hours). I asked one of the Duty Manager's why I was "lucky enough" to be put in this team. He replied "Coz you're a fuckin nutter and we thought you'd enjoy it".

I can't see this "team" lasting 18 weeks 

[Barman]

Right. This new "summer" roster that's in place for 18 weeks. First off, it's total wank. There are 15 different start/finish times so your sleep pattern is going to get utterly confuddled before too long.

Then - and this is the killer for me - we are now in static teams of 3. Previously you worked with different people every day. The team I have been lumbered with is Brian "Dangerous" D and a noobie called Brian S, who I think is 194 years old. Dangerous Brian is the Team Leader by dint of the fact he can push planes out in the tug (I'm on a course next month to do this). He's okay though. The noobie, however, can do very little. And what he can do, he does very slowly.

We were given 2 Turkish Airlines jobs today - one after the other - and these are hard, hard jobs. Most of the bags are in the 30kg mark and there are usually about 180 of them, plus 1 tonne of cargo. All in A321's, which are fairly long planes, with holds like bowling alleys. I threw all the bags/cargo out of the inbound and the two Brians stacked them on the lorry. For the outbound, old Brian S simply couldn't throw the bags far enough so I plonked myself at the top of the loading belt and threw the bags and cargo down the hold to him to stack them. I must have hit him 10 times with various bags  After about 7 minutes, he simply couldn't carry on, so I kicked him out of the hold and did it myself. Must admit I was sweating somewhat.

After those, we were given our first canteen break (we'd been out for 5 1/2 hours). I asked one of the Duty Manager's why I was "lucky enough" to be put in this team. He replied "Coz you're a fuckin nutter and we thought you'd enjoy it".

I can't see this "team" lasting 18 weeks 

 

&

[Just One More]

   The culture of the organisation stinks

[Darwins Selection]

  The culture of the organisation stinks

You forgot the " " around organisation. 

[boogs]

Right. This new "summer" roster that's in place for 18 weeks. First off, it's total wank. There are 15 different start/finish times so your sleep pattern is going to get utterly confuddled before too long.

Then - and this is the killer for me - we are now in static teams of 3. Previously you worked with different people every day. The team I have been lumbered with is Brian "Dangerous" D and a noobie called Brian S, who I think is 194 years old. Dangerous Brian is the Team Leader by dint of the fact he can push planes out in the tug (I'm on a course next month to do this). He's okay though. The noobie, however, can do very little. And what he can do, he does very slowly.

We were given 2 Turkish Airlines jobs today - one after the other - and these are hard, hard jobs. Most of the bags are in the 30kg mark and there are usually about 180 of them, plus 1 tonne of cargo. All in A321's, which are fairly long planes, with holds like bowling alleys. I threw all the bags/cargo out of the inbound and the two Brians stacked them on the lorry. For the outbound, old Brian S simply couldn't throw the bags far enough so I plonked myself at the top of the loading belt and threw the bags and cargo down the hold to him to stack them. I must have hit him 10 times with various bags  After about 7 minutes, he simply couldn't carry on, so I kicked him out of the hold and did it myself. Must admit I was sweating somewhat.

After those, we were given our first canteen break (we'd been out for 5 1/2 hours). I asked one of the Duty Manager's why I was "lucky enough" to be put in this team. He replied "Coz you're a fuckin nutter and we thought you'd enjoy it".

I can't see this "team" lasting 18 weeks 

       

[Just One More]

  The culture of the organisation stinks

You forgot the " " around organisation. 

Good point, well made (© Malcolm at work)

[Steve]

Right. This new "summer" roster that's in place for 18 weeks. First off, it's total wank. There are 15 different start/finish times so your sleep pattern is going to get utterly confuddled before too long.

Then - and this is the killer for me - we are now in static teams of 3. Previously you worked with different people every day. The team I have been lumbered with is Brian "Dangerous" D and a noobie called Brian S, who I think is 194 years old. Dangerous Brian is the Team Leader by dint of the fact he can push planes out in the tug (I'm on a course next month to do this). He's okay though. The noobie, however, can do very little. And what he can do, he does very slowly.

We were given 2 Turkish Airlines jobs today - one after the other - and these are hard, hard jobs. Most of the bags are in the 30kg mark and there are usually about 180 of them, plus 1 tonne of cargo. All in A321's, which are fairly long planes, with holds like bowling alleys. I threw all the bags/cargo out of the inbound and the two Brians stacked them on the lorry. For the outbound, old Brian S simply couldn't throw the bags far enough so I plonked myself at the top of the loading belt and threw the bags and cargo down the hold to him to stack them. I must have hit him 10 times with various bags  After about 7 minutes, he simply couldn't carry on, so I kicked him out of the hold and did it myself. Must admit I was sweating somewhat.

After those, we were given our first canteen break (we'd been out for 5 1/2 hours). I asked one of the Duty Manager's why I was "lucky enough" to be put in this team. He replied "Coz you're a fuckin nutter and we thought you'd enjoy it".

I can't see this "team" lasting 18 weeks 

 

&

seconded

Weren't they going to ban 30kg bags except for fat Americans, or is that just what they tell us passengerists.  I guess it's a case (pun?) of what can you do if some idiot in Istanbul has put them on the plane.

30 kg followed by 30kg and again and . . . . . ain't funny at all

[Barman]

Right. This new "summer" roster that's in place for 18 weeks. First off, it's total wank. There are 15 different start/finish times so your sleep pattern is going to get utterly confuddled before too long.

Then - and this is the killer for me - we are now in static teams of 3. Previously you worked with different people every day. The team I have been lumbered with is Brian "Dangerous" D and a noobie called Brian S, who I think is 194 years old. Dangerous Brian is the Team Leader by dint of the fact he can push planes out in the tug (I'm on a course next month to do this). He's okay though. The noobie, however, can do very little. And what he can do, he does very slowly.

We were given 2 Turkish Airlines jobs today - one after the other - and these are hard, hard jobs. Most of the bags are in the 30kg mark and there are usually about 180 of them, plus 1 tonne of cargo. All in A321's, which are fairly long planes, with holds like bowling alleys. I threw all the bags/cargo out of the inbound and the two Brians stacked them on the lorry. For the outbound, old Brian S simply couldn't throw the bags far enough so I plonked myself at the top of the loading belt and threw the bags and cargo down the hold to him to stack them. I must have hit him 10 times with various bags  After about 7 minutes, he simply couldn't carry on, so I kicked him out of the hold and did it myself. Must admit I was sweating somewhat.

After those, we were given our first canteen break (we'd been out for 5 1/2 hours). I asked one of the Duty Manager's why I was "lucky enough" to be put in this team. He replied "Coz you're a fuckin nutter and we thought you'd enjoy it".

I can't see this "team" lasting 18 weeks 

 

&

seconded

Weren't they going to ban 30kg bags except for fat Americans, or is that just what they tell us passengerists.  I guess it's a case (pun?) of what can you do if some idiot in Istanbul has put them on the plane.

30 kg followed by 30kg and again and . . . . . ain't funny at all

30Kg my big, fat, hairy arse....

The little man can barely lift a full pint pot.... 

[apc2010]

Right. This new "summer" roster that's in place for 18 weeks. First off, it's total wank. There are 15 different start/finish times so your sleep pattern is going to get utterly confuddled before too long.

Then - and this is the killer for me - we are now in static teams of 3. Previously you worked with different people every day. The team I have been lumbered with is Brian "Dangerous" D and a noobie called Brian S, who I think is 194 years old. Dangerous Brian is the Team Leader by dint of the fact he can push planes out in the tug (I'm on a course next month to do this). He's okay though. The noobie, however, can do very little. And what he can do, he does very slowly.

We were given 2 Turkish Airlines jobs today - one after the other - and these are hard, hard jobs. Most of the bags are in the 30kg mark and there are usually about 180 of them, plus 1 tonne of cargo. All in A321's, which are fairly long planes, with holds like bowling alleys. I threw all the bags/cargo out of the inbound and the two Brians stacked them on the lorry. For the outbound, old Brian S simply couldn't throw the bags far enough so I plonked myself at the top of the loading belt and threw the bags and cargo down the hold to him to stack them. I must have hit him 10 times with various bags  After about 7 minutes, he simply couldn't carry on, so I kicked him out of the hold and did it myself. Must admit I was sweating somewhat.

After those, we were given our first canteen break (we'd been out for 5 1/2 hours). I asked one of the Duty Manager's why I was "lucky enough" to be put in this team. He replied "Coz you're a fuckin nutter and we thought you'd enjoy it".

I can't see this "team" lasting 18 weeks 

 

&

seconded

Weren't they going to ban 30kg bags except for fat Americans, or is that just what they tell us passengerists.  I guess it's a case (pun?) of what can you do if some idiot in Istanbul has put them on the plane.

30 kg followed by 30kg and again and . . . . . ain't funny at all

30Kg my big, fat, hairy arse....

The little man can barely lift a full pint pot.... 

But at least he's allowed to try........

[Barman]

Right. This new "summer" roster that's in place for 18 weeks. First off, it's total wank. There are 15 different start/finish times so your sleep pattern is going to get utterly confuddled before too long.

Then - and this is the killer for me - we are now in static teams of 3. Previously you worked with different people every day. The team I have been lumbered with is Brian "Dangerous" D and a noobie called Brian S, who I think is 194 years old. Dangerous Brian is the Team Leader by dint of the fact he can push planes out in the tug (I'm on a course next month to do this). He's okay though. The noobie, however, can do very little. And what he can do, he does very slowly.

We were given 2 Turkish Airlines jobs today - one after the other - and these are hard, hard jobs. Most of the bags are in the 30kg mark and there are usually about 180 of them, plus 1 tonne of cargo. All in A321's, which are fairly long planes, with holds like bowling alleys. I threw all the bags/cargo out of the inbound and the two Brians stacked them on the lorry. For the outbound, old Brian S simply couldn't throw the bags far enough so I plonked myself at the top of the loading belt and threw the bags and cargo down the hold to him to stack them. I must have hit him 10 times with various bags  After about 7 minutes, he simply couldn't carry on, so I kicked him out of the hold and did it myself. Must admit I was sweating somewhat.

After those, we were given our first canteen break (we'd been out for 5 1/2 hours). I asked one of the Duty Manager's why I was "lucky enough" to be put in this team. He replied "Coz you're a fuckin nutter and we thought you'd enjoy it".

I can't see this "team" lasting 18 weeks 

 

&

seconded

Weren't they going to ban 30kg bags except for fat Americans, or is that just what they tell us passengerists.  I guess it's a case (pun?) of what can you do if some idiot in Istanbul has put them on the plane.

30 kg followed by 30kg and again and . . . . . ain't funny at all

30Kg my big, fat, hairy arse....

The little man can barely lift a full pint pot.... 

But at least he's allowed to try........

 

[The Moan Ranger]

We need a new "noobie". I broke this one