TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread

[Barman]

So by all accounts Monarch is going belly up tomorrow and I can't see Ryanair surviving their public relations cock up. Will this mean even less beer money Moanio?

Potentially. We don't handle Monarch, but I have a number of friends at Airline Services who are their handlers. Monarch is a fairly sizeable chunk of their work, so I fear there may be redundancies there unless another carrier takes over the fleet/crew pronto.

For us, the loss of the Ryanair LGW-BFS route for 4 months, coupled with the winter reduction in Thomas Cook flights, has led to our glorious leaders asking for volunteers to take 2-6 weeks unpaid holiday. If they don't get volunteers? Who knows...

 

[Nick]

So by all accounts Monarch is going belly up tomorrow and I can't see Ryanair surviving their public relations cock up. Will this mean even less beer money Moanio?

Potentially. We don't handle Monarch, but I have a number of friends at Airline Services who are their handlers. Monarch is a fairly sizeable chunk of their work, so I fear there may be redundancies there unless another carrier takes over the fleet/crew pronto.

For us, the loss of the Ryanair LGW-BFS route for 4 months, coupled with the winter reduction in Thomas Cook flights, has led to our glorious leaders asking for volunteers to take 2-6 weeks unpaid holiday. If they don't get volunteers? Who knows...

6 weeks in Cyprus, you say....

[Steve]

So by all accounts Monarch is going belly up tomorrow and I can't see Ryanair surviving their public relations cock up. Will this mean even less beer money Moanio?

Potentially. We don't handle Monarch, but I have a number of friends at Airline Services who are their handlers. Monarch is a fairly sizeable chunk of their work, so I fear there may be redundancies there unless another carrier takes over the fleet/crew pronto.

For us, the loss of the Ryanair LGW-BFS route for 4 months, coupled with the winter reduction in Thomas Cook flights, has led to our glorious leaders asking for volunteers to take 2-6 weeks unpaid holiday. If they don't get volunteers? Who knows...

  not good

Daft thing is Monarch said they were carrying more passengers than before but the price war cut their margins.  Surely supply-demand economics says that must mean there's even more flights out there to be bagged and debagged.  He guessed

[The Moan Ranger]

Monarch lost a lot of trade to Egypt, Turkey and Tunisia as a result of fears of terrorism. To compensate they shifted flights to the cut-throat Mediterrean/Greek routes, where they were simply not able to compete on price with easyJet, Ryanair and Jet2. Add to this the increased fuel costs due to the lower value of the £ and the end result was pretty inevitable. A real shame.

There are rumours that easyJet or Jet2 might pick up the airframes and crews, but I'm not so sure. Jet2 is all Boeing so the the acquisition of 45 Airbus isn't ideal. LoCo airlines don't want mixed fleets as it increases costs considerably.

easyJet are all CFM-56 engined, Monarch mainly IAEV2500 engined - again unattractive for LoCo.

Interestingly, Wizz Air (Airbus, IAEV2500 engined) have just set up Wizz Air UK Ltd. Wonder why?

[Grumpmeister]

It could be that they are seeing blood in the water in regards to Ryanair and are preparing accordingly. Even if the pilots get their way and O'Leary is sacked I can't see them recovering from this.

[Steve]

Monarch lost a lot of trade to Egypt, Turkey and Tunisia as a result of fears of terrorism. To compensate they shifted flights to the cut-throat Mediterrean/Greek routes, where they were simply not able to compete on price with easyJet, Ryanair and Jet2. Add to this the increased fuel costs due to the lower value of the £ and the end result was pretty inevitable. A real shame.

There are rumours that easyJet or Jet2 might pick up the airframes and crews, but I'm not so sure. Jet2 is all Boeing so the the acquisition of 45 Airbus isn't ideal. LoCo airlines don't want mixed fleets as it increases costs considerably.

easyJet are all CFM-56 engined, Monarch mainly IAEV2500 engined - again unattractive for LoCo.

Interestingly, Wizz Air (Airbus, IAEV2500 engined) have just set up Wizz Air UK Ltd. Wonder why?

Got to be a hope.  There's business out there to be had.

[Nick]

http://newsthump.com/2017/10/02/prince-charles-given-false-hope-after-seeing-headline-the-demise-of-monarch/

[Barman]

http://newsthump.com/2017/10/02/prince-charles-given-false-hope-after-seeing-headline-the-demise-of-monarch/

[The Moan Ranger]

DHL assumed ground handling responsibilities for easyJet at midnight 31st October.

In the preceding days, the physical split from the old company involved moving all their stuff from the North terminal baggage sortation area to the South. Chairs, stationery, lockers, IT equipment, tea bags - anything they deemed to be "theirs". The behaviour of some of the so-called Supervisors was nothing short of appalling, with much pushing and shoving over trivial things like a box of pens. Most of these people had worked with each other for 10 years and all the pent up grievances and grudges came flooding out in a quite pathetic spectacle. As I left on Tuesday evening a steady stream of brand new DHL equipment was flooding in through the security gates - 60 new electric baggage tugs (£30,000 each) 20 new pushback tugs (£200,000 each) 20 belt loaders (£40,000 each, some electric) 40 sets of aircraft steps, 150 baggage carts.

Hope they remembered a few boxes of pens 

[Barman]

DHL assumed ground handling responsibilities for easyJet at midnight 31st October.

In the preceding days, the physical split from the old company involved moving all their stuff from the North terminal baggage sortation area to the South. Chairs, stationery, lockers, IT equipment, tea bags - anything they deemed to be "theirs". The behaviour of some of the so-called Supervisors was nothing short of appalling, with much pushing and shoving over trivial things like a box of pens. Most of these people had worked with each other for 10 years and all the pent up grievances and grudges came flooding out in a quite pathetic spectacle. As I left on Tuesday evening a steady stream of brand new DHL equipment was flooding in through the security gates - 60 new electric baggage tugs (£30,000 each) 20 new pushback tugs (£200,000 each) 20 belt loaders (£40,000 each, some electric) 40 sets of aircraft steps, 150 baggage carts.

Hope they remembered a few boxes of pens 

 

So why the fuck are you on gardening leave...?

[Steve]

DHL assumed ground handling responsibilities for easyJet at midnight 31st October.

In the preceding days, the physical split from the old company involved moving all their stuff from the North terminal baggage sortation area to the South. Chairs, stationery, lockers, IT equipment, tea bags - anything they deemed to be "theirs". The behaviour of some of the so-called Supervisors was nothing short of appalling, with much pushing and shoving over trivial things like a box of pens. Most of these people had worked with each other for 10 years and all the pent up grievances and grudges came flooding out in a quite pathetic spectacle. As I left on Tuesday evening a steady stream of brand new DHL equipment was flooding in through the security gates - 60 new electric baggage tugs (£30,000 each) 20 new pushback tugs (£200,000 each) 20 belt loaders (£40,000 each, some electric) 40 sets of aircraft steps, 150 baggage carts.

Hope they remembered a few boxes of pens 

Funny and sad at the same time.  But if they need paperclips BM has got billions of them going cheap

[The Moan Ranger]

DHL assumed ground handling responsibilities for easyJet at midnight 31st October.

In the preceding days, the physical split from the old company involved moving all their stuff from the North terminal baggage sortation area to the South. Chairs, stationery, lockers, IT equipment, tea bags - anything they deemed to be "theirs". The behaviour of some of the so-called Supervisors was nothing short of appalling, with much pushing and shoving over trivial things like a box of pens. Most of these people had worked with each other for 10 years and all the pent up grievances and grudges came flooding out in a quite pathetic spectacle. As I left on Tuesday evening a steady stream of brand new DHL equipment was flooding in through the security gates - 60 new electric baggage tugs (£30,000 each) 20 new pushback tugs (£200,000 each) 20 belt loaders (£40,000 each, some electric) 40 sets of aircraft steps, 150 baggage carts.

Hope they remembered a few boxes of pens 

 

So why the fuck are you on gardening leave...?

It all got a bit nasty after I resigned. 2 of the baggage controllers who were meant to be TUPE'd across to DHL were suddenly offered better shifts if they didn't go. Last minute poaching. I doubt whether this inducement will be honoured. No great loss though as they are both lazy and fuck-witted.

I can't start until my secuity pass is transferred over and the old company is dragging their feet over this. Probably because the 2 controllers I work with (2 of the best  ) are now thinking of following me over. Lots of horse trading going on in the background, I expect a phone call from one of the Duty Managers today.

[Barman]

DHL assumed ground handling responsibilities for easyJet at midnight 31st October.

In the preceding days, the physical split from the old company involved moving all their stuff from the North terminal baggage sortation area to the South. Chairs, stationery, lockers, IT equipment, tea bags - anything they deemed to be "theirs". The behaviour of some of the so-called Supervisors was nothing short of appalling, with much pushing and shoving over trivial things like a box of pens. Most of these people had worked with each other for 10 years and all the pent up grievances and grudges came flooding out in a quite pathetic spectacle. As I left on Tuesday evening a steady stream of brand new DHL equipment was flooding in through the security gates - 60 new electric baggage tugs (£30,000 each) 20 new pushback tugs (£200,000 each) 20 belt loaders (£40,000 each, some electric) 40 sets of aircraft steps, 150 baggage carts.

Hope they remembered a few boxes of pens 

 

So why the fuck are you on gardening leave...?

It all got a bit nasty after I resigned. 2 of the baggage controllers who were meant to be TUPE'd across to DHL were suddenly offered better shifts if they didn't go. Last minute poaching. I doubt whether this inducement will be honoured. No great loss though as they are both lazy and fuck-witted.

I can't start until my secuity pass is transferred over and the old company is dragging their feet over this. Probably because the 2 controllers I work with (2 of the best  ) are now thinking of following me over. Lots of horse trading going on in the background, I expect a phone call from one of the Duty Managers today.

 

[Miss Demeanour]

Have you fixed your minimal day rate for getting out of bed ?

Bargain hard oh head hunted one 

[The Moan Ranger]

As is traditional on my last day of shift, I get a lift back to the staff car park when I've finished, rather than suffer the meandering staff bus. It means I get back to my "new" kraut oil-burner 10 minutes earlier and this can make quite a difference in avoiding the worst of the A23 traffic.

The route from the North Terminal baggage hall or "Personal Effects Sortation Team (PEST)", as I call it, takes us South through the airside roads, past Pier 3, 2 and the new Pier 1, across 1 live taxiway, past the "Stillage" where all the spare baggagee bins and carts are stored and finally out through the South Security gates.

As I luxuriated in the warmth of the company Ford Focus, my driver commenting on the level of fuckwittery displayed by some of our new starters, I noticed movement within the Stillage. My driver clocked it too.

A woman. Holding a baby.

1/4 a mile away from the South Security gates, from which lots of flashing lights were suddenly heading our way.

My driver and I swung in to the Stillage and jumped out, cornering the miscreant.  As we approached her she darted left, right and realising she had nowhere to go, she did the only thing she could. She threw her baby. At me.

As a full-back in rugby, I've never dropped a ball. But I dropped this one 

Security then arrived, checked our security passes and told us to leave.

I'm drinking beer now.