TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread

[The Moan Ranger]

Remarkably, a "quite nice" shift. No particular dramas or catastrophes. On top of the original outbound baggage I signed up for, we took on the aircraft cleaning as you know. Now they've dumped the INBOUND baggage on us. This has been, of course, poorly thought out, badly managed and ultimately doomed to failure. HOWEVER, it may prove a nice opportunity to me to unload the aircraft cleaning bollox. I've had quite enough of sticking my head down aircraft toilet bowls during audits to see if they are "to standard". The focus will all be getting on hitting the inbound baggage target (35 minutes from actual in-block time to final bag delivery) met 100%. For starters, this is a silly target - set by Gatwick, not easyJet - with fines for failure. All well and good, but most passengers won't be through Border Control and at the reclaim belts that quickly.

So for the last 2 nights, due to a lack of staff to do the inbound baggage, me and the Duty Manager have both been out collecting inbound bags and tipping them at reclaim. No heads down toilets, or checking for crumbs on seats or smears on windows. And we've both loved it. Proper graft. Monday night I did 2 inbounds - Arrecife (Lanzagrotty) and Tenerife South, about 250 bags in total. All delivered to reclaim within 25 minutes. Last night Larnaca and Hurghada, about 290. WTF Larnaca? Super heavy bags. Does everyone bring back 30kg of Halloumi? Hurghada standard heavy diving weights and other shite. 172 bags, last one on the reclaim belt in 30 mins 20 seconds. I was sweating a bit by then, and now bits of my body are hurting. It's a nice hurt.

If I can wangle it that I'm only involved in outbound/inbound baggage, I may stay a bit longer. Otherwise, adios...

Sounds good! 

I never understood why anybody would travel with their dive weights - all the other kit for sure but you can collect weights anywhere with a dive centre... 

And the Halloumi smuggling? Is it that much better than I can buy in Sainsbury's ?

[Barman]

Remarkably, a "quite nice" shift. No particular dramas or catastrophes. On top of the original outbound baggage I signed up for, we took on the aircraft cleaning as you know. Now they've dumped the INBOUND baggage on us. This has been, of course, poorly thought out, badly managed and ultimately doomed to failure. HOWEVER, it may prove a nice opportunity to me to unload the aircraft cleaning bollox. I've had quite enough of sticking my head down aircraft toilet bowls during audits to see if they are "to standard". The focus will all be getting on hitting the inbound baggage target (35 minutes from actual in-block time to final bag delivery) met 100%. For starters, this is a silly target - set by Gatwick, not easyJet - with fines for failure. All well and good, but most passengers won't be through Border Control and at the reclaim belts that quickly.

So for the last 2 nights, due to a lack of staff to do the inbound baggage, me and the Duty Manager have both been out collecting inbound bags and tipping them at reclaim. No heads down toilets, or checking for crumbs on seats or smears on windows. And we've both loved it. Proper graft. Monday night I did 2 inbounds - Arrecife (Lanzagrotty) and Tenerife South, about 250 bags in total. All delivered to reclaim within 25 minutes. Last night Larnaca and Hurghada, about 290. WTF Larnaca? Super heavy bags. Does everyone bring back 30kg of Halloumi? Hurghada standard heavy diving weights and other shite. 172 bags, last one on the reclaim belt in 30 mins 20 seconds. I was sweating a bit by then, and now bits of my body are hurting. It's a nice hurt.

If I can wangle it that I'm only involved in outbound/inbound baggage, I may stay a bit longer. Otherwise, adios...

Sounds good! 

I never understood why anybody would travel with their dive weights - all the other kit for sure but you can collect weights anywhere with a dive centre... 

And the Halloumi smuggling? Is it that much better than I can buy in Sainsbury's ?

the local stuff straight from the farm is really excellent - prolly doesn't meet any food standards but better than anything you can buy in the supermarket... 

[apc2010]

Remarkably, a "quite nice" shift. No particular dramas or catastrophes. On top of the original outbound baggage I signed up for, we took on the aircraft cleaning as you know. Now they've dumped the INBOUND baggage on us. This has been, of course, poorly thought out, badly managed and ultimately doomed to failure. HOWEVER, it may prove a nice opportunity to me to unload the aircraft cleaning bollox. I've had quite enough of sticking my head down aircraft toilet bowls during audits to see if they are "to standard". The focus will all be getting on hitting the inbound baggage target (35 minutes from actual in-block time to final bag delivery) met 100%. For starters, this is a silly target - set by Gatwick, not easyJet - with fines for failure. All well and good, but most passengers won't be through Border Control and at the reclaim belts that quickly.

So for the last 2 nights, due to a lack of staff to do the inbound baggage, me and the Duty Manager have both been out collecting inbound bags and tipping them at reclaim. No heads down toilets, or checking for crumbs on seats or smears on windows. And we've both loved it. Proper graft. Monday night I did 2 inbounds - Arrecife (Lanzagrotty) and Tenerife South, about 250 bags in total. All delivered to reclaim within 25 minutes. Last night Larnaca and Hurghada, about 290. WTF Larnaca? Super heavy bags. Does everyone bring back 30kg of Halloumi? Hurghada standard heavy diving weights and other shite. 172 bags, last one on the reclaim belt in 30 mins 20 seconds. I was sweating a bit by then, and now bits of my body are hurting. It's a nice hurt.

If I can wangle it that I'm only involved in outbound/inbound baggage, I may stay a bit longer. Otherwise, adios...

Sounds good! 

I never understood why anybody would travel with their dive weights - all the other kit for sure but you can collect weights anywhere with a dive centre... 

And the Halloumi smuggling? Is it that much better than I can buy in Sainsbury's ?

the local stuff straight from the farm is really excellent - prolly doesn't meet any food standards but better than anything you can buy in the supermarket... 

Wot he said ^^ the local homemade stuff is yumster...

[The Moan Ranger]

Another shift done, another shift closer to resigning - despite it being a "nice" shift, no cuntishness or abject fuckwittery.

[Barman]

Another shift done, another shift closer to resigning - despite it being a "nice" shift, no cuntishness or abject fuckwittery.

Excellent!

 

[The Moan Ranger]

I fell asleep driving home from work Tuesday evening after another utterly cuntish day, luckily at traffic lights. Woken up by cars angrily beeping at me.  Enough.

Resignation tendered yesterday. Bigg boss locked me in his office stating "You can't resign"

Red rag to a bull. I'm normally very controlled and careful with my demeanour and language, but the inner Millwall came out and I went ballistic. Language to shame a docker. After 20 minutes he stood aside, wished me good luck and told me I would welcomed back immediately should I choose to return later. Unlikely.

Now we watch...I told my best friends - good, good men and women - my choice. Two have already said that if I'm going, they're gonna go. I told them not to be stupid/hasty, but they claim they are only still there because I (and my immediate boss, the lovely Paul) were there. Paul has told me that I had to go, he's seen me lose the love over the last year or so and is worried for my health. He'll be gone before the year is out.  The dominoes will fall.

A very emotional evening/night.

[Barman]

I fell asleep driving home from work Tuesday evening after another utterly cuntish day, luckily at traffic lights. Woken up by cars angrily beeping at me.  Enough.

Resignation tendered yesterday. Bigg boss locked me in his office stating "You can't resign"

Red rag to a bull. I'm normally very controlled and careful with my demeanour and language, but the inner Millwall came out and I went ballistic. Language to shame a docker. After 20 minutes he stood aside, wished me good luck and told me I would welcomed back immediately should I choose to return later. Unlikely.

Now we watch...I told my best friends - good, good men and women - my choice. Two have already said that if I'm going, they're gonna go. I told them not to be stupid/hasty, but they claim they are only still there because I (and my immediate boss, the lovely Paul) were there. Paul has told me that I had to go, he's seen me lose the love over the last year or so and is worried for my health. He'll be gone before the year is out.  The dominoes will fall.

A very emotional evening/night.

Good man, hard to do but you couldn't continue like that... 

[Nick]

Well done. Knowing when to walk away and actually doing it is a good thing 

What next? 

[Uncle Mort]

Sounds like a good, and necessary move. Well done   

[Steve]

What they have said TMR ^.  Right move but appalling that shit upper management have forced you to this. 

I see that the industry is boasting that the Easter holidays will be no problem well I believe your accounts suggest that at best that's a very fragile position.

[The Moan Ranger]

Ongoing Air Traffic Restrictions in France (...until 8th April  ) continue to cause big problems. Lots of planes finishing their day's flight some 2 hours later than scheduled. So we had a big problem in having 32 cleaners last night, but few planes to clean. Then a mad rush to clean them when they did arrive in the remaining time. Also, my new baggage "tippers" - a lot leave at midnight, when approx only 20 should remain to land. Last night it was 30. So I didn't have enough tippers to ensure the ridiculous 35 minute delivery time.

Spent 3 hours out on the airfield, in appallingly shite weather helping out and eventually all done by about 03:30. Back to the office for a coffee, then Airfield Ops (internal airfield "police") call to say that some of my empty baggage carts on the West Field need to be moved as the wind is gusting so hard that they are moving and posing a risk. The few remaining tippers are on a break, so muggins here takes the long drive (at 15 mph) to collect them and return them to our sheltered yard. 8 of them - 2 trips, 45 minutes. Absolutely soaked,

But I loved it. Honest, no strings graft. No whinging staff, no petty squabling, just me against the elements.

Got back to the crew room in time to give a briefing to the outbound baggage boys (and girl) and spent another 10 minutes being hugged and "you can't leave" whispers in my ear.  Soppy sods. I love them all.

[Barman]

Ongoing Air Traffic Restrictions in France (...until 8th April  ) continue to cause big problems. Lots of planes finishing their day's flight some 2 hours later than scheduled. So we had a big problem in having 32 cleaners last night, but few planes to clean. Then a mad rush to clean them when they did arrive in the remaining time. Also, my new baggage "tippers" - a lot leave at midnight, when approx only 20 should remain to land. Last night it was 30. So I didn't have enough tippers to ensure the ridiculous 35 minute delivery time.

Spent 3 hours out on the airfield, in appallingly shite weather helping out and eventually all done by about 03:30. Back to the office for a coffee, then Airfield Ops (internal airfield "police") call to say that some of my empty baggage carts on the West Field need to be moved as the wind is gusting so hard that they are moving and posing a risk. The few remaining tippers are on a break, so muggins here takes the long drive (at 15 mph) to collect them and return them to our sheltered yard. 8 of them - 2 trips, 45 minutes. Absolutely soaked,

But I loved it. Honest, no strings graft. No whinging staff, no petty squabling, just me against the elements.

Got back to the crew room in time to give a briefing to the outbound baggage boys (and girl) and spent another 10 minutes being hugged and "you can't leave" whispers in my ear.  Soppy sods. I love them all.

 

[Steve]

Ongoing Air Traffic Restrictions in France (...until 8th April  ) continue to cause big problems. Lots of planes finishing their day's flight some 2 hours later than scheduled. So we had a big problem in having 32 cleaners last night, but few planes to clean. Then a mad rush to clean them when they did arrive in the remaining time. Also, my new baggage "tippers" - a lot leave at midnight, when approx only 20 should remain to land. Last night it was 30. So I didn't have enough tippers to ensure the ridiculous 35 minute delivery time.

Spent 3 hours out on the airfield, in appallingly shite weather helping out and eventually all done by about 03:30. Back to the office for a coffee, then Airfield Ops (internal airfield "police") call to say that some of my empty baggage carts on the West Field need to be moved as the wind is gusting so hard that they are moving and posing a risk. The few remaining tippers are on a break, so muggins here takes the long drive (at 15 mph) to collect them and return them to our sheltered yard. 8 of them - 2 trips, 45 minutes. Absolutely soaked,

But I loved it. Honest, no strings graft. No whinging staff, no petty squabling, just me against the elements.

Got back to the crew room in time to give a briefing to the outbound baggage boys (and girl) and spent another 10 minutes being hugged and "you can't leave" whispers in my ear.  Soppy sods. I love them all.

 

[The Moan Ranger]

2 shifts (both all night shifts) left...last night's shambles was just a premonition of the absolute carnage awaiting when summer really gets going...

The Union has just rejected an average 13.4% pay rise. So that'll make it even funner 

[Barman]

2 shifts (both all night shifts) left...last night's shambles was just a premonition of the absolute carnage awaiting when summer really gets going...

The Union has just rejected an average 13.4% pay rise. So that'll make it even funner 

Oh gawd... Thankfully have no plans to return to the UK this year!