just to go off topic for a minute..
Big black prostitute - Chelsea fan - got a tattoo of John Terry and Frank Lampard on the inside of her thighs. She says to her punter "if you can guess who they are you get a free shag". He looks to the left and then to the right and says "I dunno who those ugly bastards are but the one in the middle with the fat lips and curly hair is Shaun Wright-Philips!