Disgusterous

Author Topic: Material for apc  (Read 117448 times)

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Offline Barman

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #615 on: March 06, 2013, 06:50:12 PM »
As our sex life hasn't been great recently, the other half decided to buy a sex toy to try and heat things up a bit, so she's bought a vibrator that looks just like a magic wand. Just as well really, as her fanny looks just like a Wizards sleeve.

I saw a sign outside the Greengrocers saying, 'Cucumbers, (loose) 75p'. Cool... I think I'll get one for the missus since they've got her size.

happy001 happy001
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Offline apc2010

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #616 on: March 06, 2013, 06:51:10 PM »
As our sex life hasn't been great recently, the other half decided to buy a sex toy to try and heat things up a bit, so she's bought a vibrator that looks just like a magic wand. Just as well really, as her fanny looks just like a Wizards sleeve.

I saw a sign outside the Greengrocers saying, 'Cucumbers, (loose) 75p'. Cool... I think I'll get one for the missus since they've got her size.

happy001 happy001

 :thumbsup:

Offline Baldy

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #617 on: March 07, 2013, 09:00:08 AM »
As our sex life hasn't been great recently, the other half decided to buy a sex toy to try and heat things up a bit, so she's bought a vibrator that looks just like a magic wand. Just as well really, as her fanny looks just like a Wizards sleeve.



I saw a sign outside the Greengrocers saying, 'Cucumbers, (loose) 75p'. Cool... I think I'll get one for the missus since they've got her size.



I met a strange woman last weekend, who liked being shagged in the ear! I discovered this purely by chance. Every time I tried to stick my cock in her mouth, she turned her head to one side!



My son came home from school all chuffed about gay marriage being legalised.
"Why are you so happy?" I asked. "Have you even got a boyfriend?"
He scrunched up his face dramatically, then replied, "It's the principle."

"Really?" I said. "Well, at least it's not the priest again."



What's the difference between a Norwegian polar bear and Prince William? The polar bear didn't have to get married before eating a posh nice person.



As the two horses are neck and neck on the finishing straight, one of the jockeys leans forward and whispers into his horses ear, "Every Little Helps".

 lol: lol: lol:

Offline apc2010

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #618 on: March 08, 2013, 07:41:11 PM »

The South African police have said that Oscar Pistorius may get the electric chair.''''''

If you ask me he was dangerous enough on a pair of stilts, never mind giving the fecker a mobility scooter..............

Offline Baldy

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #619 on: March 08, 2013, 07:43:38 PM »

The South African police have said that Oscar Pistorius may get the electric chair.''''''

If you ask me he was dangerous enough on a pair of stilts, never mind giving the fecker a mobility scooter..............

 lol: lol: lol:

Offline Barman

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #620 on: March 09, 2013, 09:10:34 AM »

The South African police have said that Oscar Pistorius may get the electric chair.''''''

If you ask me he was dangerous enough on a pair of stilts, never mind giving the fecker a mobility scooter..............

happy001
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Offline apc2010

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #621 on: March 11, 2013, 04:24:12 PM »

The Paki at work just said "Roll on five o'clock."......

"You want to try roll on at eight in the morning, you smelly bastard."....

Offline Baldy

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #622 on: March 11, 2013, 04:25:43 PM »

The Paki at work just said "Roll on five o'clock."......

"You want to try roll on at eight in the morning, you smelly bastard."....

 lol: lol: lol:

Offline Barman

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #623 on: March 11, 2013, 04:41:33 PM »

The Paki at work just said "Roll on five o'clock."......

"You want to try roll on at eight in the morning, you smelly bastard."....

happy001
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Offline apc2010

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #624 on: March 12, 2013, 07:24:41 PM »
So Chris Huhne's new girlfriend is in fact a bi-sexual............

not quite true she only likes one cunt.......... whistle:

Offline Baldy

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #625 on: March 12, 2013, 07:25:53 PM »
So Chris Huhne's new girlfriend is in fact a bi-sexual............

not quite true she only likes one cunt.......... whistle:

 lol: lol: lol:

Offline Barman

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #626 on: March 12, 2013, 07:27:06 PM »
So Chris Huhne's new girlfriend is in fact a bi-sexual............

not quite true she only likes one cunt.......... whistle:

 lol: lol: lol: lol:
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Offline Just One More

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #627 on: March 12, 2013, 08:12:44 PM »
 lol:  lol:  lol:  lol:  lol:
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline apc2010

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #628 on: March 13, 2013, 09:48:29 PM »

My girlfriend said she wanted to spice up our sex life.......



 so I began with cumin on her tits..............

Offline Just One More

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #629 on: March 13, 2013, 10:48:50 PM »
 lol:
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie